[Asami]

No she couldnt

[littl3chocobo]

so i read both pages from begining to end and i must say, i have lost a lot of sympathy for asami's situation, i have personally been in her shoes several times and yet i have managed to change so much for myself i also have read how asami makes no effort whatsoever to do anything to help herself out

i live about 14 miles from town, i was so sick of being called lazy and worthless and not trying that i fucking /walked/ to go fill out applications in town, a short while later my father actually used his clout to help me get a job. he and my mom are firm believers in doing it yourself, what does that say that 6 hours of walking was enough to prove to them i was willing to work? and yet you are the third person to hear this outside of my parents. i understand that there are travisties and injustices that are faced by us all but the way you handle them and the way you speak? you are saying 'i deserve this' and 'please more i can take it' you are doing nothing to help yourself and sweetie, all the effort in the world does no good if that effort is not put to something good

also the way you speak to everyone who has replied as well as the way you tell your story does not lend it credence, -1 point for every 'nothing' 'everything' and 'only' those are words for small children sweetie not a near-adult. it makes you look bad and it makes your story look dramatic and untrue. you would also do well to stand behind offers, if you say you will share do not say 'nevermind it is private' when asked


also X''D dude is right, that /is/ the constitution and to be honest they really only meant free white males

[Asami]

Lol like I said I'm not going to be using big person words because I'm not on a computer

I am trying and that's all that matters it may not seem like it to you
my town is pretty big so by the time.I put in all the applications ive walked about 10++ miles
I wouldn't feel safe walking out of town because I live really close to east st Louis. Bad stuff man.

Honestly I just wanted to get shit off my chest man. Not looking for /your/ approval

[Asami]

Let me add that I do this every chance I get
my mom doesn't let me out of the house to go on 'walks' much
and when I do I have time restraints and I have to have someone with me who my mom badgers asking when ill be home and such

[Yokuutsu]

I know how you feel on the job thing and trying to get out and everything.

I'm semi-in the same situation. Except I do have a car, but no one that I've found around here is willing to work around a college student's schedule, but I'm about to graduate....so after that....I have hope of working at Wal-Mart.

Some of things people have said in, I completely disagree with. Apparently they don't realize that we're in a recession. Guess what that means? That even if you have a way to get to the job, walking, driving, whatever (We have no public transport here)...that doesn't mean you'll find a job ever. I couldn't even get the university to hire me in any of the many jobs they have open to students. I couldn't get Wal-Mart or Pocket's (a gas station/convenience store that's open 24/7) to hire me. So I know on the job thing.

And someone said something about birthdays not mattering and that a party could be a small group of friends? I don't remember anything being said about a part-now...a cake? Sure. I have to beg to get a cake. A cake is all I ever want. I dislike parties. But I don't think it's too much to ask for something useful for a birthday and a cake. A cake can be made cheaply. Or bought if no one wants to make it.

@littl3chocobo
Some people can't walk 14 miles. Like me. I walked around the zoo which I assume is less than that...and by the time I left...I was in extreme pain and couldn't get up and walk once I sat down in the car. So not everyone can do that. Not everyone can do what everyone else can. Just saying. Though I'm glad it worked out for you.

Also, she's trying to do more than most people. Plenty of people wouldn't even think of walking to work even if it was just down the street. I'd walk, but depending on how far it is....I might not make it or make it time. She's willing to walk, but I doubt she want to walk 5 miles or more to a job....there'd be no point depending on how fast she walks...or slow. Five miles would be 2 and a half hours AT LEAST for me. Maybe she walks faster, but that's five hours a day. Plus 8 hr work shift=13 hours. Then 8 hrs of sleep=21hrs. That leaves three hours or less to shower, get dressed, eat, and anything else she may need to do since her parents may still expect her to do everything at home too.

Just saying-just because she gets a job or goes to school....that doesn't mean anything will change. Or it might change completely. I'm not psychic so I don't know. If I did, I'd tell her what to do to fix it all.

I also tend to look at people in a better light as long as they aren't using me because they don't know how to live their lives (such as using money for drugs that could go for food) so that's why I see things like this for Asami. I could be completely wrong, I don't know Asami that well and I don't pretend to. You could be right.

[Asami]

Oh yeah my knees give out if I walk too far without rest so the 30 miles to walmart would kill me plus having to actually work!!

Thanks for understanding yoking. I really am trying my hardest I swear ive put out a million applications
u.ui hope to work at Tom's the most because its really close and I know the store really well. But they rarely hire and i always seem to miss the hiring Dx like really I have put in 25 applications there and I check it all the.tome u.u no luck

I too hats parties all I wanted was a cake its like the symbol.of birthdays... is that so wrong???
Oh well people have opinions right?

I wish you luck on your job hunt really good luck. I hope you get a job

[Asami]

Oops missed that last part
all the Money I get goes to a fund tl save for an apartment to move out to
also part goes to food when I //need it

[Poggio]

Asami, I am not going to reiterate a lot of what was said in the thread. Where there is a will there is away. Unlike the others I know a bit about what your brother has done. Your mother in my opinion sounds like the least of your worries. However the fact that you got anything at all does show me that they care, in there strange way about you. Especially considering your birthday was mostly a car ride back from a test. I have told you once before that you need to talk to some one. I don't care if you are scared but fuck it all, it sounds like domestic violence. If you talk to some one as embarrassing as it will be for your family I can promise you they will put you in a better situation. They have group homes for this very reason. Hell you are 19 which means you are a legal adult in most cases except for drinking. It means you can make your own doctor appointments and and the very least call a fucking help hotline. The girls and boys town will still help you. Guilt Free I might add. They are paid to listen and offer advice. It is not the job or your mother that worries me the most it is the fact that you are bulimic, a cutter, and getting abused by a family member.

The Job thing. Woman you have a computer or a phone, clearly you use it to get on the internet. Where there is a will there is a way. Just because your mother refuses to drive you doesn't mean you can't do it. Most applications are done online now a days and even so you could possibly find a job that you can do at home. It requires a little research and dedication. You could also try finding a job in your boyfriends part of town. It could potentially mean moving in with him. We have talked about the job thing before and it just seems like for now you aren't willing to contemplate other aspects or ways to get a job. You are stuck on the hurtle that you can't get to a location. I think that Xun was right ( about a lot of things) If you show people in your small town you are willing to work you will get a job.

I have come to realize that you are the only female daughter in the house. You need to realize that your parents being traditionalist in their faith that means different rules for you. I means that you are suppose to be the good Christian woman. It does not mean you fall in to the role and since you can not seem to speak up for your self just know that is what is expected of you until you can prove your parents of your individuality. I understand this, my family is southern baptist. I have been guilt tripped by hell fire and brim stone enough to make me want to die a virgin.

In response to Xun and yours argument: It is in the Bible hell it is one of the ten commandments. Honor Thy mother and Father. I do not think there is an exact quote that says he has made us Equal and if it is it has been blow out of context for various advocacy groups to use.

My biggest issue like I said before is that you talk to some one. I don't care if you sit at your phone and roll your eyes thinking 'oh hell I know all this' as long as you fucking do it. Things are not going to change for you unless you become proactive in your life. There is another quote I am not sure if it is in the bible but “God helps those who help themselves.” Even if you don't believe get out and do and stop just voicing your opinion to those that can't really do anything for you. Maybe it will light a fire under you and show you if you truly desire it only you can make it happen.

[Asami]

My mom wouldn't let me work in mikes town. She would never let me move in with him plus I would nit want to be a burden. U.U its not mikes house its his parents and I dint want to push myself on them.

I don't have either now I just have this kindle
its hard as hell to type on it and even thinking about doing an application on it o.o plus my dad wouldn't let me apply online D: no matter if I ask he would freak out!

I'm just not a strong person. I'm justvweak..



I did say the commandment about honoring thy mother and father...

I cant talk to someone... ;-; I would be in sooooo much trouble!!!

[Poggio]

Why are you so afraid of talking? A phone line is just you and another person. It can be done outside, out of an ear shot. I know it seems like you have a lot at risk, but you have a boyfriend he can be your life line. Trust me if he truly cares he will help you get out of this no matter what your parents say. It starts by simply talking and those phone lines are going to be better then us trisphians.

[Asami]

My parents listen in on my convos randomly. I wouldn't know

[Poggio]

I thought you were using a cell phone? Even if they are it is one sided and can quickly be ended. Just go for a walk when you feel you need to talk, it will put you far enough away from the house you can see if any one is trying to listen.

[Asami]

I don't have a cell phone) :
edit well I do but it only has Internet on it

[Poggio]

How does your phone get internet but not basic phone service? I would think that would cost more then just a line that talks, given data rates and what not.

[Asami]

It doesn't really o.o its shut off but I can still use wifi xD

[Poggio]

Then I am going to find you a hotline that has an Im service that way your parents can not track what you are doing and you can still talk to some one. Outside of that I found the information for the boys and girl town in Missouri. ( I think that is the state you said you lived) I want you to at least try talking to them, see about options and what not.