[trystan830]

heh yeah, i hear you there.

i added on a weeknight because i wanted to get more hours so i could get more in my paycheck to help pay our huge credit card debts that my husband (who would go go-karting at least 3 or 4 times a week for a LOT of last year) had no idea how it got that bad.... *sigh* he just doesn't want to admit that he got his own card just for the go-karting. what did he think would happen? we haven't won any huge lotteries - ever. *sighs again*

sorry for that rant there....

[ShadowGrimReaper87]

Oh no, it's OK. ^_^ Husband's,they can be such a pain then turn around and be the sweetest. Lol Mine can be a butt at times.

[trystan830]

actually... the last time he did something randomly sweet for me? ::wracks brain:: uh.... i'm sure he did, but between however long ago it was, and my Swiss Cheese Memory™, i totally can't remember.

most of the time he's just a weirdo.

[littl3chocobo]

-coughs awkwardly- i'm not a pain at aaaalll!

[Glitch]

You know, husbands/boyfriends tend to be weirdos XD

[littl3chocobo]

>/ gosh darnit! i am not a weirdo either, you lot are /so/ rude!

[Glitch]

you're not my boyfriend! Don't worry you're safe.

[ZenKitty]

I want sorbet now. Yummy.

Chuckles and nods at the discussion of husbands/boyfriends.

[trystan830]

well, hubby's a guy, and guys are weird. i came home from my second job tonight, and he's watching a show on netflix on his phone, using headphones... and he doesn't even wave or anything, but rather rolls over and falls asleep on the couch. wut??

[SparX]

good evening guys!

[Glitch]

still stuck at work

uggg so tired

[SparX]

Omg no that's terrible

[trystan830]

so hubby wakes up from the couch about 11. i said something about still sleeping off his cough, since he's on the tail end of getting rid of a cold (and a pesky cough). he snarkily comments something about catching up on his sleep, so he's not sleep deprived (or something like that.... and i'm pretty sure this is a dig at me, since i go to bed later than him and i guess he thinks i'm sleep-deprived too?)

so he goes and gets ready for bed, and then (grudgingly) comes over to where i was sitting at my computer and kisses me good night. i say 'love you,' and while he says it back, there's something in his voice that i'm like 'that's not his usual voice.'

after a few moments, i go back in the bedroom and ask if he's all right, he says he is in a tone that says he's clearly not. i let him know i'm here if he needs to talk to me, and he again says he's fine in a snappish kinda tone. so i concede, saying 'okay' as i leave the room.

i go back to my computer, put away the crochet project i had out to work on, finish up online, do my bedtime stuffs (take a quick phone call from my mom) and i'm back in the bedroom by 11:30. he's already asleep, but i wake him up, and definitely let him know i'm in bed now. and somewhere in there, i end up asking him if he's good now, and he says he's good.

so when i go to turn the lights out, we do our usual goodnights - i say 'love you' and he says 'love you too' - and this time there's no funny undertones, just him sleepy and about to fall back asleep again.

but now i wonder - is he going to expect me to go to bed at the same time as him or shortly after him every night? i don't know if that will actually every night....and after an undetermined time (1? 2? 10? nights) will he get weird again a tme?

he's been sleeping a lot, yes to get over the cold, but he's 'lost' two big things a few months ago (his go-karting, and someone he thought of as a son - the kid was doing the teenager thing, and essentially they 'broke up.' another long story.)). i'm wondering if i want to mention that this could be a precursor to something else? (like depression maybe?) but he's a guy. he doesn't really like to talk about it (even though he knows i'm there for him), and he definitely doesn't like when it comes up more than once. *sigh*

sorry that was long....

[trystan830]

...and i killed the thread. XD

[ZenKitty]

No, you didn't kill the thread. I have been planning to comment, but I had to go to the office.

Men really haven't been socialized to be in touch with their emotions and an unfortunate consequence is they lack some of the emotional intelligence that women have. Couple that with the tendency for depression to manifest as irritability in men and shutting down and it makes discussions like that even more difficult.

You could however tell him that you're concerned about x, y, and z. You could let him know how it affects you - from a loving and kind standpoint, of course. You could also see if it's temporary or lasts for awhile.

People aren't clinically depressed until they experience the symptoms for a period of at least 2 weeks and now with the DSM-V, they are labeling grief under depression, which irks me to no end, but that's another story.

I know a lot of people who don't even register that they are depressed until they are severely depressed. It just doesn't fall on their radar until it's really serious.

Best wishes with this.

[ShadowGrimReaper87]

Yeah men can be a bit odd at times, but socan we women! Lol During the summer me and the hubby chase each other around the house with ice and try to put it down either the shirt or pants! XD lol