[SolarCat]

Everything is crazy at the moment, I thought I'd write it all out to get my thoughts in the same place...

First, the everyday things are hectic enough. Our desks got moved to a new building at work, but they're not quite done building it, so the windows aren't caulked and the heat by my desk doesn't work and everyone is here wearing jackets and gloves - for computer work. It's ~50 degrees at my desk.
School started up this week, so I'm taking my next class. I don't even remember what it's called, some sort of high-level Finance thing though. I'm having a tough time adjusting to taking classes again after the break... I will be fine though, as by next week I should have a feel for the class and the deadlines and I can concentrate on the school work itself.

But then there's lots of other things on top of it.

Dan bought us a pair of tickets to see Les Miserables on Broadway this past Sunday, as my birthday present. So we went, and had a magnificent time, and he finished off the day with a proposal. I am now officially engaged. <3

My parents don't know yet, because I feel uncomfortable bringing it up over the phone. It's not what it sounds like...
My grandfather has been in the hospital for almost a month now as a result of a brain hemorrhage while he was taking blood thinners for a heart condition. It's been a roller coaster, he'll get better and then worse and then better again. Two days ago the hospital said he needed to move to hospice and he may not survive the week. Yesterday they said he was in too good a shape for hospice so he'd need either long-term in-home nursing care or a nursing home. He's been in and out of the ICU four times.
Every time I talk to them on the phone, they want to talk about Pappap and my Dad is having an especially tough time coping (it's his father), so it's not really the sort of news I feel comfortable announcing, you know? I'm going down to see Pappap this weekend, so they'll find out then.

Speaking of that visit, my sister's birthday is on Sunday, so I wanted to celebrate with her as well. My mother said she was having a party for her on Sunday around noon, last she said to me. My sister said she wanted to do ice skating, so Mom just cancelled the party because "Ice skating bother's SolarCat's ankles" and announced that the family would be going to the Farm Show instead because "SolarCat is coming up." It's my Mom who wants to go to the Farm Show, and I hate that she's blaming it on me! I'm fine with ice skating! I told Dan that we're going to back up my sister, and so Dan had better have a sudden and desperate desire to go skating on Sunday, because he rates higher with my mother than my siblings and I do, so that's the only way my sister will get the party she wants. I've been to the Farm Show a lot more often than I've been to a birthday party for my sister, since she's only ever had ONE birthday party here entire life. (But at least she remembers my sister's... She never even acknowledges my one brother's birthday, because she never remembers, because she doesn't like him since he won't let her control his every move and she'll admit this to us like it's normal).

Adding to this, there's a 'friend' of mine who I am worried about talking to about this. She and Dan used to be best friends, and she's how we met. I went to tell her about it, and before I could she started going on about how horrible a person Dan has become since he bought me a promise ring, and how it got even worse when I bought him a $5 promise ring at a Farmer's Market. Their relationship is strained because in the last six months she only contacts him to demand things - that he visit, that he pay for her dog's vet visit, that he hasn't given her the usual Christmas present he used to buy "from her daughter" every year and when is it coming...
And to top it off, she made it clear before that she was expecting we would get married and she'd better be in the wedding party. If she was the friend she used to be, I'd be all for it, but I don't recognize her as that friend lately, and I really don't like the way she's treating Dan. But it's going to be VERY messy when these things come to a head, and I'm not looking forward to it.


So, lots of conflicting feelings and feeling them all at once! My life is certainly INTERESTING right now, to say the least.

Dan is such a sweetheart, though... He is so thoughtful, and so good to me, and I am so grateful to have him by my side through all of this. And I am so excited about the ring he bought for me! I'm not usually a materialistic person... But it's the sentiments behind the ring that matter. It wasn't expensive (or at least, he keeps promising me it wasn't, and that he timed his purchases for days when they were having a sale), it's just SO full of meaning. Our song is "All of Me" by John Legend, and he basically custom picked the bits for the ring (right down to the flaw in the diamond) to coincide with the refrain of that song.

All the THOUGHT he put into it... I'm starting to cry again just thinking about it... <3 <3 <3 I'm a lucky girl.

[Karastorm]

Awww Congratulations on the preposel. Your friend could just be jellious or she's used to getting her own way with your now fiancee. With out knowing more it's a little hard to really understand hat may be running throuh her mid. Either way smile and be happy sounds like you have a lovely man who's willing to move heaven and earth just to see you smile.

[SolarCat]

Originally Posted by Karastorm

Awww Congratulations on the preposel. Your friend could just be jellious or she's used to getting her own way with your now fiancee. With out knowing more it's a little hard to really understand hat may be running throuh her mid. Either way smile and be happy sounds like you have a lovely man who's willing to move heaven and earth just to see you smile.

There's definitely jealousy going on. They dated at one point, but she dumped him for someone else because the other guy made more money. (And by "made more money" I mean "was working for an actual job where he got paid and had health insurance, instead of working for HER for free in her cleaning business".)
She's taken him for granted for a long time, and doesn't understand the impact that has on a relationship.

Honestly, I'm torn on whether or not to stay friends with her. She was always so supporting and wonderful in the past... But I think she thrives on drama, and I had plenty in my life when I needed the support, whereas I've worked through it now and she's still working to create more to fill that gap? Or something.



You are right about Dan, he is absolutely willing to move heaven and earth for me. <3 To the extent where he knew I was uncomfortable about being the one to break the news to her, so he just told her... And because it came from him, not me, it went a lot smoother than it would have, at least for me. He won't tell me how it went for him, so there's a good chance he really did just walk across hot coals for me there...

[Lawtan]

*Hugs* I wish you luck with your folks. Also, having gone through some similar in-and-out of the hospital stuff with my grandparents...*hugs*

Whatever happens, we'll be here for you. :)

[SolarCat]

Updates!

My sister had a birthday part, and most of the family was there, so that turned out very well. She had a rough day for other reasons, so having the family there to celebrate with her really helped her feel better.

I wasn't able to visit my grandfather, though... I picked up a cold, and with the state of his immune system, it was a bad idea for me to stop by. He's doing much better, though, so that's good! It also means that I will have more opportunities to see him that originally expected, as it sounds like he'll be around for a while yet. :) I was able to see my grandmother, so that was a nice bonus.

And Dan is still the sweetest guy ever, and I am so very blessed. <3

[ml1201]

Glad things went well with the party, and glad that even though you couldn't see your grandfather you'll still have a chance to since he's doing better. As for your friend, it seems like she's mad that Dan is not giving her attention like he does you? But why she'd wanting that knowing you two are together is not being a good friend because she's making it sound like she wants him to herself now. o.O I mean, sure he shouldn't completely cut her out of the picture, but for her to demand things from him or you is in my opinion crossing the line. Even if you are friends you don't do things according to her whim.