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Asami
![]() Rainbow Goddess
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#1185 | ||
I wouldn't care if you punched me x'D I can take a hit. I do have 4 brothers.
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![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 12:46 AM |
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#1186 |
Meizicht
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xD I'm stronger than I look, lolol
I do have to say, I'm not any kind of saint, as much as that makes me out to be kind of pitiful; I like my attention as much as anyone else, and I have no self control so I end up blurting things out anyway. Dx Hence how I mess everything up. Plus it's not like I don't want things like gifts or the attention of others, and it's not like I don't want Kai ( since I brought that up ). It's just that I regret having those things afterward, or I expect something bad to happen because of it, or I feel guilty for it, because I don't really think my personality is all that great ( I mean hell, if you knew me a few months ago, I think you'd all be tired of me by now. Dx I complain a lot, and with Kai, I'm cold and kind of pissy at all times because of some things that happened before. ) Might also be because I think too logically. From my point of view, I cannot for the life of me understand why my parents insist on me living here with them, jobless and just doing whatever. Like... aren't I just kind of a black hole, then? They could be much better off if I wasn't hanging around and living off their income. And what makes me even worse is that not even that motivates me to leave the house. To me, emotions like "I'm happier when you're here" make no sense, because in time, it just kind of fades off ( Plus I'm hard to communicate with irl eAo; So that in general confuses me; how people would like being around me ). So I think in the long run, the absence of me here would be the best. xD;; ( Not trying to be gloomy, it's just logic, rofl ) At the same time, all of this stuff, to me, does not apply to other people. It's hard to explain. @__@; Really, I have all that coming to me. xD; It's karma, lol | ||||
![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 12:58 AM |
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Asami
![]() Rainbow Goddess
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#1187 | ||
Like I said I have 4 brothers. I got beat up a lot. Hell Christian still hits me all the time. And he hits hard. U.U hes not even ripped or has muscles. I have this friend who is all body builder and tough. Has a lot of muscles. Christian punched him and left a huge bruise. He bruises everyone he punches ;-; and it hurts like hell. Most of the time people loose feeling in their arms or wherever he hit. Anyways. I'm used to it so I could take it.
I don't even know how to respond to that huge block of text x'D don't get me wrong I read it.. its just Im not that great at responding to things. And I'm not good at making people feel better no matter how hard I try ono I'm more of just a listener/reader. But I am sure your parents don't think of you as a black hole. Karma for what? Also I think id still like you if I met you long ago. You seem like a generally awesome person to talk to and easy going. You seem like the type of person id be friends with irl. //shrug everylne complains. I had a friend. Well not really a friend but yeah she complained all the time. The only reason why I found it annoying was because shes one of the most fake, rude, horrid human beings I know. She used and abused me to the point that I am broken. But I don't like talking about it much unless I'm in a sour mood but yeah I don't think id mind your complaining seeing you are a nice and awesome person ^^ | ||||
![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 01:15 AM |
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#1188 |
Meizicht
![]() Cage
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Just because I think those things/say those things doesn't mean I'm upset or feeling bad right now. It's just how my brain works. xD
And I'm also pretty much the same, when it comes to listening. Since I'm not really qualified to give advice, I try not to, which makes it awkward when people talk to me about things. Since I never know what to say. xD; | ||||
![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 01:23 AM |
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Asami
![]() Rainbow Goddess
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#1189 | ||
I suck at giving advice
I'm like "uh.... I'm sorry bad things happened ;-;" which usually doesn't help a person out x'D I try though.... | ||||
![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 01:24 AM |
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#1190 |
Duce
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Meizicht feels the same as I do about everything. People look at me funny because I say sorry- and always can find a reason why I could have prevented something; usually my selfishness is what makes things happen. Because I didn't do something, or didn't want to..or because I decided not to.
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![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 01:32 AM |
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Asami
![]() Rainbow Goddess
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#1191 | ||
I automatically say sorry for everything. People tell me I'm annoying for it
someone steps on my shoe. me: "sorry" Someone brushes against me. Me: "sorry" Ectect idk I cant help saying sorry. It just comes out ;-; | ||||
![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 01:34 AM |
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#1192 |
Duce
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Someone complains that they've burned themselves on the oven, and I say sorry because I could have gotten the item out, or have been watching to make sure they wouldn't end up reaching too close to the sides, or perhaps could have somehow made sure that there was something I could have done to prevent the item from having to be baked in the first place.
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![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 01:49 AM |
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Asami
![]() Rainbow Goddess
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#1193 | ||
Oh gosh... me too Dx
I don't even understand why I do it... do you? People always make fun of me for it. Or purposely do things to make me say sorry a lot. | ||||
![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 01:52 AM |
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#1194 |
Lauv Keiko
![]() Silent Scream
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![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 02:09 AM |
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#1195 | ||
Because it's my fault. Everything has always been my fault. I can pretend it doesn't bother me, but everything always makes me so anxious. Any angry person is another person I could have made happy if I hadn't screwed up. I'm learning to get over it, but I still get a racy heart and end up not being able to breathe properly.
So...I ignore it. And play it up like I don't care, at all. Don't run too hard Keiko, can't have you out of breath and exhausted! XD | ||||
![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 02:10 AM |
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#1196 |
Asami
![]() Rainbow Goddess
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I think that as well but It doesn't make me understand why I feel this way....
//snuggs lauv | ||||
![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 02:14 AM |
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#1197 | ||
Because everyone blamed everything on you while you were growing up, punished you for those things, and gave compelling arguments why they were your fault? XD
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![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 02:18 AM |
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#1198 |
Asami
![]() Rainbow Goddess
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Probably
I have mentally blocked a lot of memories from my childhood so I cant recall but with my mom it makes sense But I know it got bad after my sophomore year of hs where this chick really messed me up.. | ||||
![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 02:27 AM |
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#1199 | ||
I don't remember most of my childhood, couldn't remember most of it when it was happening, so I dismiss it, and all my speculations are mostly kept to myself, because I can't prove anything, or remember it.
It's kinda weird, but I mostly only remember the present. Same went for when I was little. I remembered that day; mostly. I have bad memory retention. So I tend to just assume I don't remember because of that, but I have these notions. Still, no sharing. | ||||
![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 02:36 AM |
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#1200 |
Asami
![]() Rainbow Goddess
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Terrible memory is terrible
I remember a few things like watching shows or certain events buti have 4 brothers who tell me things that they remember and I try to piece together things from that. Anyways I am starting to feel sick I might get off soon | ||||
![]() | Posted 08-23-2012, 02:39 AM |
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Tags |
asamey, honey_hyjin_archaickitten, littl3chocobo_poggio, moonless_meizicht_toxxic, pacho-shii |
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