[Helsinki Harlot]

>.< Damn it. It's gonna be a muscle seizure night.

[*Zane]

D: that really sucks, would resting help any?

[Mizeria]

-snuggles Hels-

[Helsinki Harlot]

No, it's kinda uncontrollable. It's actually worse if I'm lying down. It's kinda normal for me tho', muscle seizures that is. They last anywhere from 10 minutes to about an hour. The only good thing is that it's not every day and every night. Only a few times in a couple of weeks unless it's a bad week for some reason. So far I haven't found anything that works to stop them, I used to fight them just clench up and not let it happen but that hurt a lot worse so now I just let myself have my fit and then try and sleep.

[whitexsuicide]

have you seen a doctor about them?

[Helsinki Harlot]

I have a leg specialist or whatever those doctors are called. In both of my feet my Achilles's muscles are only half formed, my feet are flat and my bones ares starting to separate in them, my ankles don't sit properly where they're supposed to so that they curve inwards and I essentially walk on the side of my feet (which means I'm not medically allowed to wear heels because they could snap my ankles). I also have a muscle issue where my muscles grow completely attached to my bones instead of gliding on top of it, I used to have meds for that when it first sprung up really bad but since I've stopped doing sports or moving around at all they took me off the meds.

[whitexsuicide]

OwO wow hell... you seem to have a lot wrong with you... kind of makes me feel better about myself~

[Espy]

That...sounds...really painful >__<

[Helsinki Harlot]

Haha yeah... I do.

I've been like this since I was a kid tho', and more shit just gets added on as I get older. When I was 15 they told me I'd probably be in a wheel chair by the time I was 30.

I got my first foot care products when I was about 6-7. My torso is also mis-alligned. One side of my ribs and shoulder sticks out more forward than the other, I mean it gives me an adorable shoulder dimple but it gets in the way and can be painful sometimes.

[Helsinki Harlot]

Espy; It is. ^^; Technically I could be on pain killers but I am terrified of addiction. I've tried hydrocodone that I got through my friends when some of my pains were kinda bad and I loved it. I'd never felt so... I don't know. It's weird, not having pain your body. And that scared me. So I refuse pain pills. I don't want to wake up one day and not be able to get my shit done because I ran out, or waste money on it. Especially with how addicting pain killers can be. I'll get some friends once in a blue moon but I try and stay away from them.

I also have sharp bone pains, I don't really know how else to describe them, it's like someone is taking a drill through the center of my bones. I've had those since I was a kid too. They last about 12hrs minimum and happen in my arms and legs. I haven't gone to the doctor recently about those because my parents told me I was faking the pain and I was just being a baby about growing pains. =/ So. And now I don't have the money to cover that.

The worst part is how it affects work and school. I rem. at one shift i had at my job (which the work schedule they had us on I learned was illegal) I had to crawl my way up the stairs when I got home. Some days I can't physically get up out of bed.

[Mizeria]

hydros are the best..

sorry to just pop in the middle of a conversation...
I remember being on those in the hospital a while back

[saw loved in bold and wanted to know what you loved]
>////<

[Helsinki Harlot]

It's all good. You're welcome to pop into any conversation. :3 I was just explaining some of the issues I have.

I've had it a few times, I've done a lot of other things too (not just prescription things) and out of all the things I've done, hydro scares me the most because I could see myself getting addicted to that. So far, I'm not addicted to anything except for maybe the habit of smoking. (As in sometimes I'll just light a cigarette and not even inhale because I like having it in my hand as "something to do"). I'm not about to start, I've been around too many people and seen what it can do to want to ever go down that path.

[Mizeria]

-hugs hels-

I wish there was a way to take everyones pain away
mizzy feels useless sometimes

[Helsinki Harlot]

Haha, that's generally what humans have to deal with. Tho' pain is sometimes a nesc. evil. You can't understand happiness or kindness if you don't understand pain. The most anyone can ask for is just understanding and company or something like that. Anything after that is just a bonus. <3

[Mizeria]

-hugs-
okies
I think..
I just know a couple people with a lot of physical issues.
and I always feel so helpless because theres nothing I can do for them

[Helsinki Harlot]

Honestly? Indulge them in their special needs. Like, for me I can't walk very far or very long. So my friends would make me walk all the time far distances and I'd keep telling them I couldn't but no one wanted to take me into consideration so I just stopped going out with people. Or if I have to go a different path than others because I can't walk it (like walking across bumpy grass or large rock covered beds could snap my ankles, so I have to walk all the way around the area and I end up getting ditched a lot.)