[McSwiggins]

Got married early in life and loved her so much. She got Leukemia and died. It was awful and I was so upset that all I wanted was to commit suicide.
Afterwards, started dating a mutual friend my late wife and I shared. She eased my pain and made me want to live again. Then we got married and she became mean. I became unhappy and felt trapped and cheated with my current girlfriend. When I divorced Queen Bitch, my ex, I felt free and happy. I promised myself I would never get married again. Last night I caught myself looking at engagement rings online and fantasizing about marrying Janna. I really think I want to be her husband but I am afraid of it going sour or her dying. I almost feel like this is some sort of trap.

[Glitch]

My boyfriend of the past 3 1/2 years doesn't ever want to get married for the very fear I'll become mean because he proposed to his ex and she turned very quickly, he took his ring back. I personally do not think it is fair to judge everyone the same, one person os rotten doesn't make everybody rotten. But you have to make sure you'd be asking her for the right reasons.

[McSwiggins]

Guys tend to be as timid as a deer when it comes to relationships and commitment. I'm sorry its that way for you but I understand his fear completely. I know that one doesnt equal all. I'm never a "all or nothing" thinker but I am just afraid of being trapped and unhappy again...or another widower. But I would be asking her for the right reasons. She takes my breath away. She amazes me with every little thing she does. She's gorgeous in my eyes, she's a wonderful mother, nurturing, caring. She's passionate. There is definitely so much love and adoration I feel for her and I want to be with her. But feeling all if this doesnt make me any less timid about marriage.

[Glitch]

hmmm maybe you should talk to her about your fears

[Potironette]

I feel quite a bit too young to give any advice but here's a kid's take on it:

Talking to her sounds like a good idea.

I can understand why people would feel trapped in a marriage, but isn't what you really want to marry her? Plus it's not like you're doomed to be unlucky in marriage.

My birth birth dad married my birth mother. Once my birth dad left for a business trip, she had an affair and they broke off. Now he's happily married to someone much kinder and less argumentative than my mother. (My birth mother is now married to another person, and they both talk behind each other's backs while mutually supporting each other. I suppose they were made for each other.)