[Merskelly Metalien]

;-; I feel like crying and screaming and dwelling on every single failure, mistake and fault of mine until I beat myself to a pulp and then die of hunger and sadness. But I need to go to the DMV today... ;U; *inhale* </3

[Kaderin Triste]

Well shit. The bloodening is upon me. XP
Brace for incoming cramps.

[Merskelly Metalien]

Oh no. ;0; I feel you Kaderin!
Periods are the worst. >:'{ I'm trying to unsubscribe from mine but it keeps coming back!

[EverAshwood]

My asthma medication has quadrupled in price. My doctor fucking picked it for me because it was so goddamn cheap, but AS IT TURNS OUT, only the first 12 units are that cheap. I thought it was an issue with my insurance, but it was the brand, with the aforementioned 12 unit deal. My rescue inhaler is even MORE expensive.

I literally can't afford to breathe. KMN ;-;

[Espy]

housing issues, miscommunication, and uhhhh some really bad politics discussions with my dad which means I might be out of parental support in terms of tuition and... everything. Worst case, I end up paying a total of $450 to 500 to fly, by myself, to AZ, and move from old dorms to my new housing, and just... don't fly back to CA for the rest of the summer.

It's doable, but I'd also be basically burning bridges with my parents.

[EverAshwood]

Within months of moving back in with my parents, I had to stop doing laundry on "my day" since no one else had an assigned day and did all their laundry on mine. Literally every week for months.

Now, a year later, I'm an asshole for wanting to get literally any laundry done. My brother's girlfriend does laundry literally EVERY day, which makes it impossible to do mine now that the dryer is broken (since her clothes CONSTANTLY cover the... drying tree? Clothesline collapsable? In the backyard). I called her out on it, but since her and my brother can make their claims louder than me, I'm a liar and an asshole. With 5 bags of dirty laundry, stuck in my dirty clothes. I can't even take a shower because I'd just be putting fucking dirty clothes on. I just keep fucking breaking down crying because I can't fucking do anything about it, I can't even afford to go to the coin wash down the road.
Like seriously don't underestimate how much your personal hygiene can affect your mental health because honestly it makes me wanna fucking die half the time


Edit: and... i just got apologized to?? That doesn't happen in my house, thats... anxiety inducing... but I'll hopefully be able to do laundry tomorrow..?

[Merskelly Metalien]

I suck so much at taking care of myself. <x'} It's hard changing old habits..
I really need to step it up. Gotta get sh*t done. Gotta keep eating healthy snacks. Gotta stick to a proper schedule. <xD "Suuurrre!" I say as I'm stubbornly unmoving and unfeeling as a stick of cinnamon.

[Kaderin Triste]

My apartment is a legitimately disgusting hovel right now and I have a ton of garbage that I should take out but I get super paranoid at night and don't like taking it out during the day because some of it is icky, smelly, used poop sands from the cats and I feel awkward having to carry that past my neighbors if they're outside smoking...

[Death by Mirrors]

Does it help if you remind yourself their smoking also stinks? And you'll be passing them by in a few seconds with that poop sand, whereas it takes several minutes until the lingering cigarette smell is gone again.

[Kaderin Triste]

Kind of a little except that, while my kitties are grandfathered in, the apt complex is techinall "no pets allowed" now, and one of my neighbors is a creepy af asshole who would probably find some way to use taking stinky litter to the garbage to come up with some way to get me evicted or something.
>.>

Today's awful: after meeting with boss about my job, am mildly concerned that she may try to drop me down to just handling rental setup and nothing else, which would screw me financially and potentially mean being homeless...
So full of stress and anxiety right now that I am having to really try hard to not just break down into ugly crying while walking to my other job...

[Merskelly Metalien]

Damn. I'm skipping my workout today I guess. >~<;
Ughhh, my schedule is all screwed up now. ;-; Now I'm 1 step down from committing myself to the routine. Noooooo...why do I do this to myself?

[bluebird]

my daily awful is still being too afraid to admit my true daily awfuls

[Kaderin Triste]

OMG, plz stop with the anxiety spikes plz, life! My emotions can't handle it anymore...

[EverAshwood]

For some reason I've only been able to get 2-3 hours of sleep a night all week and it hurts how exhausted I can be without being able to fall asleep
This is just torture

[bluebird]

last night my fridge didn't have enough space, so i drank a third of a gallon of milk then went to sleep
now i'm facing the repercussions. oof

[Merskelly Metalien]

someone ate the last banana. ;-; and my recovery shake tasted weirdly gross and banana-less again as a result..*sigh*