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Awen Moonshine Awen Moonshine is offline
Double Rainbow
Lightbulb Dirty little secrets...   #1  
Do you have a secret you want to tell, but just can't seem to voice it?
Well, guess what? This is a place where you can post it and release your kept-in emotions and feelings that are burdening your life with stress.

The purpose of this thread is so that you can let out your emotions: excitement, resentment, or anything else that you are feeling at the time of posting. It is for releasing your secret into an environment where you can keep your secret hidden from people in your surroundings, and letting your friends know what you are going through without formally telling them. If you would like, you may also write your secret as an unsent letter.

If a secret is posted in this thread then it is okay for you to read, but the one thing that I would ask is that you do not respond to anyone's secrets. Remember, you are allowed to post whatever you want and as much as you want, in as much detail as you would like. You are the writer of your own life. Therefore, it is your secret!


Quoting is in fact a way of replying. Please keep this in mind when posting. Thank you.
Old Posted 10-24-2014, 07:14 AM Reply With Quote  
Default   #2   Awen Moonshine Awen Moonshine is offline
Double Rainbow
I'll start things off...

I'm not coping well with being a new mum... My anxiety and depression have been kicking in hard recently but I can't tell you this because I don't want to worry you...
Old Posted 10-24-2014, 07:18 AM Reply With Quote  
Lawtan Lawtan is offline
Dragon Storm
Default   #3  
I have a strong tendency towards suicidal thoughts, usually sparked by the subject of identity (so, for me, gender/sexuality...and the concept of free will/purpose). The personal pronoun I use for myself is not "He/She/They" but "it."
Lawtan: A chaotic dragoness with issues.

��s ofer�ode, �isses sw� m�g.


Science, horror, folklore, and cuteness incoming!
Old Posted 10-24-2014, 11:02 AM Reply With Quote  
Default   #4   Witchchylde Witchchylde is offline
Here's mine:

I often have dreams where I'm committing acts of violence. Strangling, or stabbing, sometimes even tearing someone apart with my bare hands. This is why I try to leave music playing while I sleep, to sort of direct my dreams away from the random violence. And most of the time that works well.
Old Posted 10-24-2014, 01:53 PM Reply With Quote  
Den Den is offline
I’m just really tired, okay?
Default   #5  
As of late, I've been feeling more and more like I'll never be able to make anything of myself, that I'll be forever doomed to living out of Percy-car, and that I won't be able to provide for my basic needs. That I'll forever be a failure and will never get away from being poor and dependent on other people's kindness forever.
I use They/Them pronouns.

Originally Posted by Gallagher
i'm not being biased, den just speaks my language
Roll4It Dice RP Server | Buy me a Ko-Fi?
Old Posted 10-24-2014, 05:04 PM Reply With Quote  
Default   #6   Ginger Ginger is offline
I've been feeling like something potentially horrible will happen to the United States. It could be anything, really. But mostly I fear the fall of our economy again. Just this last week the stock market dropped 300 points in a day. I just can't help but feel like most people are oblivious and they just keep spending, and digging themselves into a deeper hole. The overall percentage of Americans that are receiving government assistance is staggering. I've been afraid of speaking up in fear of being labeled as paranoid. My mother is Schizophrenic and many people know, though I know I am not. It just makes it easier for them to call me crazy.
☼ ☾ ✰

Old Posted 10-24-2014, 05:59 PM Reply With Quote  
Okirin Okirin is offline
Default   #7  
I had lots of issues as a teenager, and ended up putting work above everything, even relationships. So, even if purely technically it's not exactly right, I am still a virgin: I didn't had sex with anyone yet, nor even kissed.
Old Posted 10-25-2014, 06:02 AM Reply With Quote  
Default   #8   Awen Moonshine Awen Moonshine is offline
Double Rainbow
I don't think I'm going to get passed by ATOS next week and will have to go back on JSA again, which I just can't do as it sent my mental state spiraling back to square one again last time...

I'm now on the waiting on the waiting list for physio on my back, but no-one knows how long it will be before that starts, but I have been given pills in the mean time to manage the pain, but I hate taking pills and will probably only start taking them if my back gets too unbearable. Considering I have been dealing with my back pain for the last 7 and a half years though I doubt that I'll start taking them any time soon unless I have another fall...
Old Posted 10-28-2014, 11:53 AM Reply With Quote  
Yeladim Yeladim is offline
Default   #9  
I can't figure out how to get my younger son to do his work early and not procrastinate. I suffered from the same problem but my parents didn't appear to care so I never stopped until I started working for myself.
I've got my pink hair and I'm ready to go!
Old Posted 10-28-2014, 05:13 PM Reply With Quote  
Default   #10   ml1201 ml1201 is offline
It's over 9000!
I'm extremely lazy and would prefer just playing video games all day. Sadly though that doesn't make any money (or at least not for me) and doesn't help me get out of my parents' place. Good news is I have a better paying job now~ Now to just get those accounting certificates. *sigh* I hate this economy, you'd think that someone with a degree in math would be doing better then retail when they got out of college, but NO. >_>
Old Posted 10-29-2014, 08:52 AM Reply With Quote  
SolarCat SolarCat is offline
Addicted to Trisphee
Default   #11  
I used to dread my birthday every year, because my mother would always find a way to turn it into a horrible, stressful day. To name a few examples:

There was the year she screamed at me for having the audacity to spend time with my friends when they visited instead of cleaning the house while they were there.
There was the year she visited me in college and pushed me away when I went to hug her, announcing I was an ugly, greasy-haired child who looked homeless, and she wouldn't talk to me unless I took a shower. (My hair looked greasy because it was still WET from the shower I had taken before they arrived.)
There was the year she made me a kind of cake I had hated for YEARS and yelled at me when I wouldn't eat it. (I wouldn't eat it because when I was much younger she had made me eat a half-baked one as my only food for a week as punishment for something I was too young to understand was wrong - I had thought I was helping. But she won't even admit that ever happened. To this day, I still can't eat that cake, OR the fruit that's in it.)
There was the year I was a horrible and ungrateful child for not liking the 'gift' she had been trying to force on me for the last six months (when I literally had an inability to even use it - who uses a giant steel-reinforced suitcase they aren't tall enough or strong enough to lift when EMPTY, in a room several floors up with no elevator? Wheels don't help me with that). She told me before she gave it to me, "I have a present for you, but you're going to hate it," and then was surprised when I told her I hadn't come up with a use for it since I had turned it down the week prior, and angry that I scuffed up the bottom in my attempts to bring it upstairs (empty, at her insistence) to the point she couldn't gift it as "new" anymore.

I can never win with her. I can't even break out even.

Living several hours away, over the last few years I have had enough space to retake back the days that should be mine, because it's too far for her to travel comfortably. I have had some great friends who have gone out of their way to make the day special until finally, my birthday is mine again...

And now she's announced that we're celebrating my birthday together this year. My parents have picked a restaurant halfway between, because I have a gift certificate to go there and they want to try it. At least it's not going to be at my house, like originally announced... (That is a complete other story, but my mother is not allowed at my house after her first and final visit there, the day after I bought it.) And I can't say 'no' because I have been through those repercussions before, and they are not worth it.

I am an absolute mess, and it's getting worse as the week gets closer.
I'm not allowed to like my birthday, because my birthday is about my mother, not me, and it's going to always be like that until one of us is dead.

I dread my birthday. It's the worst day of the year.
Last edited by SolarCat; 10-29-2014 at 05:39 PM.
Old Posted 10-29-2014, 05:29 PM Reply With Quote  
Default   #12   Awen Moonshine Awen Moonshine is offline
Double Rainbow
My emotions keep flip flopping more than a dying fish searching for water...

One minute I am super happy and then the next I find myself crying and not knowing why and then back to being happy... It's normally pretty manageable, but just this last week or so it's gotten really bad... I'm sure it's because of extra stress but I could really do without it...

In memory of Dorian Floyd Corkin 18/04/2007 - 31/07/2007

My Dice Store
Old Posted 10-29-2014, 07:35 PM Reply With Quote  
Yeladim Yeladim is offline
Default   #13  
I have a big, but not terrible secret that I am keeping from nearly everyone online and I've kept it for so long, I worry about the reaction if I was to reveal it. I am not whom I pretend to be.

I've got my pink hair and I'm ready to go!
Old Posted 10-29-2014, 07:40 PM Reply With Quote  
Default   #14   Den Den is offline
I’m just really tired, okay?
I hate hospitals. I get that they help people, but I have so many memories of bad things happening to people I cared about in them that I am never comfortable going. Even though I know I should probably go and get my head checked from the accidental blow I took to it today. I hate hospitals that much...
I use They/Them pronouns.

Originally Posted by Gallagher
i'm not being biased, den just speaks my language
Roll4It Dice RP Server | Buy me a Ko-Fi?
Old Posted 10-29-2014, 08:13 PM Reply With Quote  
ml1201 ml1201 is offline
It's over 9000!
Default   #15  
Okay, so our dog gets sick and we can't get him to the usual vet to look at him, so we go to the next closest one that works with that vet we normally go to. Well, some of the problems that we've been having health wise for our dog this new vet spotted and the old vet never even so much as mentioned these problems. So now we're getting our dog towards recovering, but this new vet wants him on a diet because he's over weight by at least four pounds and the vet wants him to loose five. And my mother, the idiot that she is, is having a fit with my dad doing as the vet says, saying we're starving our dog even though we're following what the vet said because they seem to know what they are doing. So my mom was talking to other people who owned the same breed of dog, and they spoiled their dogs so now my mom wants to keep spoiling the dog. And on top of that she's saying that the new vet has no idea what they're talking about when the new vet was the one who figured out the dog's health issue while the other vet just lumped it in with allergies when it wasn't just allergies but ear infections in both freakin ears! >.< I want to smack her but I know that won't solve any problems. >_> My mother is a complete idiot that thinks she has to do like everyone else.
Old Posted 10-30-2014, 07:14 PM Reply With Quote  
Default   #16   Awen Moonshine Awen Moonshine is offline
Double Rainbow
So I have my first physio appointment today apparently, but all I've had is a phone call, no letter to confirm or tell me where to tell me where I am supposed to go... But to be honest I am not sure that I do want to go...

In memory of Dorian Floyd Corkin 18/04/2007 - 31/07/2007

My Dice Store
Old Posted 11-04-2014, 06:34 AM Reply With Quote  


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