[Lioshika]

Granted, however you are a horribly disfigured boy and must repeat all of elementary school again.

I wish I could sing better in the shower.

[katyasha]

Granted, however your singing causes the pipes in the shower to burst.

I wish for a job.

[Lioshika]

Granted; you'll work 16 hour days 6 days a week with no breaks.

I wish for a working pen.

[Tarrek]

Granted; You'll get a pink pen that only works on recycled paper

I wish for some Skyrim DLC

[Jessibuns]

Granted, but the game stops working.
...
I wish i knew if they really were my friends

[Rinni]

Granted; but now you aren't sure if your family is really your family.

I wish I wish I had some fish.

[katyasha]

Granted, but the fish you got are piranha's

I wish for a nice quite evening.

[Rainbowfox Ari]

Granted: But for every sentence you speak, you make a verbal typo.

I wish my Muse would come back...

[Rinni]

Granted, but he is now a Valley Girl who demands you draw KAWAIIDESU girls. : D

I wish I had some rice.

[Rainbowfox Ari]

Granted: But then for each grain of rice in your bowl, there are ten cockroaches in your yard.

I wish my car would drive itself...

[Rinni]

Granted, but it drives off with that cute minivan down the street into the sunset, leaving you high and dry.

I wish I had more wishes.

[Ultima]

Granted, you get 2 wish coupons but they expired =/

I wish the new event will start tomorrow!

[Rainbowfox Ari]

Granted: But the event lags the site so badly, that people ragequit overnight!

I wish I could become a fox at will.

[Rinni]

Granted! But it's fox hunting season. >D

I wish I was a kitty cat, who could dancedancedance and could dancedancedance.

[Rainbowfox Ari]

Granted: But you have an Evil Miku mocking you every step you take.

I wish my parents and brother would freaking LISTEN to me.

[Rinni]

(( NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO )))

Congratulations, wish granted! But now they're listening. Always listening. While you sleep. While you eat. Even your thoughts are privvy to their listening ears. And it will never. EVER. Stop.

I wish my family wouldn't dismiss my ideas so readily.