[Claire Bear]

okk but to be fair, i dont think ANYONE can explain american taxes lmao.

[Gallagher]

I MADE FOOD AND DIN'T BURN MYSELF

[Mekatra]

Kids are like flowers, they need water, food, shelter from the cold, and someone willing to love them... and boom, they'll grow.

It kills me when I see brilliant individuals infantilized to the point of not being able to call the doctor's office to make their own appointment or cook a basic meal. Society failed them, and instead of being helped most the time we just let people keep doing it telling them "Oh it's okay, your anxiety is a good reason to let other people do it." NO. It isn't, because if all those people helping them went away then they would be fucked. Cutting off someone's independence is NOT doing them any favors. Yes everyone has limits and we all need help at times, but actively enabling others to slip below their capability levels is tantamount to abuse.

[Espy]

Originally Posted by Gallagher

I MADE FOOD AND DIN'T BURN MYSELF

see that's already better than me

[Mekatra]

Sorry, I get worked up about this.

[Espy]

Yeah, sure, but I have crippling anxiety when it comes to phone calls, and life would be a lot easier if my parents didn't try to push -ordering a pizza by phone- onto me. Doctor's appointments and stuff, sure, just give me like...a day to prepare and a night to have an anxiety attack, and I can do it. Sort of. With... some difficulty.

[Claire Bear]

no mekatra, i agree with you.

like, you can blame your parents for causing your problems initially, but you only have yourself to blame if you don't fix them yourself.

[Mekatra]

There's a big difference between things you HAVE to be able to do to function in society and things that are just easier other ways though. Them pushing you to call for pizza isn't doing you any favors. Encouraging you to deal with your own medical things and empowering you to make mistakes on occasion would be a lot better way of handling it.

I taught my husband how to cook by literally saying "It's okay if you mess up, ingredients can be replaced, just try your best. Here's a list of recipes, pick one you want to try." and turning him loose saying "You're making dinner on X night."

[Gallagher]

things go bad when i get let loose in the kitchen, haha. i start looking at the condiments and going, WHAT WILL ADD FLAVOR, PROBABLY DRESSING RIGHT

[Espy]

Why would you start with the condiments /aaahhhhhhh/

[Mekatra]

Yeah, but if you end up liking it then that's a good thing. If not, well... oops. Experimenting in the kitchen is how delicious recipes happen. How many tasteless flour blobs do you think happened before someone discovered cake?

Anxiety also always pushes the "What's likely to happen if I mess this up?" meter WAY too far over into the "TERRIBLE THINGS" side, when in reality the effects of most mistakes are fairly simply fixed, but since no one has ever taught you how to fix it, you think you've ruined everything.

[Gallagher]

I DON'T KNOW, ESPY

CONDIMENTS ARE LIKE SAUCES RIGHT

I LIKE SAUCES

[Mekatra]

Cooking is like figuring out your sexuality. There are things you're going to love the first time you try them and no matter how they're made you'll love them. There are things that you are never going to want to put in your mouth again. There are things you only like when prepared or presented in certain ways.

You won't know though, until you're exposed to them.

[Espy]

Okay, fair, I generally don't use much in terms of sauce when I cook.

[Claire Bear]

my little sister taught me how to boil water when i was 17. lol. -_- pathetic.

[Mekatra]

Nah, we all gotta learn sometime.