[gremlin]

I'VE RETURNED.
but now you're leaving.

- cry cry -

[MuseSick]

-snuggles - we can talk here for a bit.
It's hard to type on my iPod though xD

[gremlin]

I don't expect you to chat much, I have difficulty changing my boyfriend's status to "I eat poop" on his smart phone. 8D

[MuseSick]

xD your poor unfortunate boyfriend
It's okay j still loved you -Licks your eye- : 3

[gremlin]

MY EYE!

[MuseSick]

So what are you thinking?

[gremlin]

Thinking?
I don't know.
HURP. I want to RP. <3333

; A;

I love our characters, bwhaaaa.

[MuseSick]

So- This is what I was going to say in a comment for the most part. I replied to something else first so I don't remember the whole speech I had in my head.

With my family- it's that I hate every single one of them, I can't stand anyone in my family.. Because there are little things wrong with them.. Each one of them, that makes me hate them.. I mean- of course there are things wrong with me too but it's not quite the same..

To make it short.. I wont rant on about past events that have really fucked me over.. But I'll keep it point form..

David Lia - My so called "Dad"
He acts like I'm never good enough.
I'm basically a dissapointment to him.
He's abusive, physically and emotionally.
He threatens me constantly.

Susan Lia - My So called "Mum"
She told me back in 7th grade "Normal people don't feel that way"
and to "keep my feelings to myself"
So that socially fucked me over..
To the point where I can't- well I can, but I have the HARDEST time talking about my life, because I'm been forced not to since the age of 6.

My sister - If you could find my Dear Diary post.. Hell I'll find it for you if you want to read it.
She's self centered
And it eats me up inside, my sibling envy, I watch other people, who fight but are always there for one another.
And realize how crappy and one ended our relationship is.

And that's just immediate family, without any examples why..

[Funkduder]

...*raises a sign: FREE HUGS*

[MuseSick]

Funk- Giving hugs? OH MY!
-Gives Funk a hug-
Since when do you want hugs, eh?

Oh- and Neirra, I have enough to buy a yearly off of you~

[gremlin]

My mother's entire family is pretty fucked up.
They're all on well-fare and take advantage of people.
My mother herself, is unstable mentally and emotionally. She always thinks that she's right, it can be over the most ridiculous thing and she's 'right'.
She will constantly yell at me and make me feel like a useless piece of shit. Whenever I try to talk to her, ask her how she's doing, she seems uninterested in a conversation. I try to interact with her, it drives me insane.
Her mother treated her like shit, so she's treating me like shit. I honestly think that that's why she seems to favourite my brothers so much and resents me. Her mother did that, she was also the only girl.
I'll be sobbing and she will roll her eyes and tell me to get over myself.

The other week, she was searching for something, called me through and asked "where did you put the baggy with Mila's fur in it?" Mila = our recently put down dog who we all loved. I must have accidentally thrown it out. But that isn't MY fucking fault. Who leaves such an important thing just laying around, unmarked and shit? My boyfriend was over, she started yelling at me. I had to take a seat because I felt as if I was going to throw up. I started to hysterically sob and my boyfriend went to come through, but backed away when he saw my mom screaming at me. When she left, he came up to me and assured me that it wasn't my fault. But... the way she talked to me. No one should be talked to like that. As if they're not worth anything.
And now it's like she has gotten worse. Since that happened. She did come up to me and said that she was sorry and that she loved me. But now it's like... she gets angrier at me. It's like a fed her a reason to hate her, even though it's not my fault that she left it in there, how the fuck would I know what it was?

[Funkduder]

Originally Posted by MuseSick

Funk- Giving hugs? OH MY!
-Gives Funk a hug-
Since when do you want hugs, eh?

Oh- and Neirra, I have enough to buy a yearly off of you~

Who said I wanted hugs? *hugs MuseSick*
You looked like you needed one...XP

[gremlin]

Oh oh.
I didn't donate yet.

> A<

[MuseSick]

Haha- funny thing is. My friend likes to tell me I have a "Just been kicked" look. Because I have a tenancy of looking sad... That or Asian. But that's not the point. Thank you though..

@ Nerria. I know.. Exactly how you feel..I think it could be because I'm overly sensitive though.
My Dad- he's the type of person where, when he introduces me to people who may not remember who I am, he tells them I'm the youngest one, the one who could have played ball like his sister. Or that I want to be a goth. THAT'S what he tells people. He tells them I could have been just as good as my sister is, when I played, if my sister and I played in the same league I would have been better than her. He tells people I'm lazy, and that's why I don't want to play, because I don't weight 120 pounds like my older sister does.

I hated the sport. I wont even go watch my sister play, not that she deserves it. Because I can't STAND when he sits there and tells people I'm basically a loser who threw away everything I could have been good at. I can't call him out on it because he's always right, no matter WHAT. Hell- One day he said I was wrong and my favorite colour was orange. Like FUCK it's MY favorite colour. But he constantly acts like I'm such a disappointment.
But he doesn't even KNOW what I'm capable of because he never comes to my recitals.. Hell.. He does so many things... And that's just one of them.. And he does that at LEAST 1 every 2 days.. At least..
And it makes me feel like shit- Like being a musician and a write would never be enough. Like playing baseball is some godly thing, and he tells me stupid shit like "Have fun paying for school" and "you could have had that too"
But he never stops to realize.. It's not what I want.. It never was.. -sighs- Sorry.. Long rant here..

Edit: completely fine. I honest to god.. Don't even know if I want a yearly, or which one I want~

[gremlin]

Sweetie, you can rant for as long as you want to.
And your post can take up an entire page.
I don't care, I care about comforting you. Just post, rant, do whatever. I'll listen. - nods -
Or read... read it.

[MuseSick]

You know you can do the same..
It was kind of the soul purpose for me making this thread.
Because I love helping people, and listening, and sharing thoughts..
Because I want to be a shrink.
But not the bullshit kind that does everything by the book..
The kind that actually tells you the truth..
and gives you outside of work phone numbers, encase they need someone to talk to..
Outside of an appointment..