[katyasha]

My brother thinks I have a problem meeting new people. Yesterday I was at this event at the game shop with him and he thought I was giving out way to much info of myself and my life to some of his friends.
I can't help it I never had any good friends in my life when I grew up in a town in New Mexico where everyone in my generation hated me because I was different.
I'm trying my best to come out of my shell and be well me and for some reason my bro is not impressed at all. Got any suggestion on how to fix this or something that doesn't evolve me embarrassing myself,my bro, and everyone else as well.

[Belial]

My grandparents recently had a woman come to their house to discuss how to set their house up for her oncoming blindness.

They discussed in detail, with someone they just met, my cousins divorce. I have no idea what that had to do with my grans eyesight but it was their choice to discuss that with her.

I think your brother could be worrying over you too much.

[Kali_Namir]

I'm not very good with new people either, so when I go to meet someone new or hang out with people I end up either clamming up or trying to be the center of attention. It's actually thanks to places like Tris that I've gotten better with small talk.

Usually the first thing that goes through my mind is that I need to make a good impression, then I need to do my best to not give away too much information. It's kind of like when you first join a forum site, sure most of the people you meet here may never know you IRL, but then again, they could. But approaching it in a kind of "Do I want everyone to know" way is a good way to handle it. Then if certain people are receptive to you and enjoy your company, that's when you delve a little deeper.

As for around your brother's friends, the worst thing for him would be if you recount all of his most embarrassing moments. It's actually a great ice breaker, but just make sure he's not too sore about it. When my little sister would bring her friends over, I would often get stuck 'baby sitting' and so it would end up with just me and her friend in the same room while my sister did something, so I ended up telling how when my sister was little she taught all the kids in the daycare to pee outside on the playground. (My sister is actually kind of proud of this now, she thinks it shows that 'even at an early age she was a leader'), but still it broke the ice with the friend. It's also a great lead into getting laughter started by having people tell other embarrassing moments.

I would say talk to your brother about it, see if he's okay with you throwing out a slightly embarrassing moment to break the ice with. If he is, then allow him to follow up with one about you, that gets the conversation started, and allows all the chips to be thrown out and people feel a little more comfortable.

But mostly, talk with your brother, ask his opinion on what you could do.

Also, if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm someone who will listen and try to offer some advice.

[Ae86]

I'm really super shy at first.. It is hard for me to talk to strangers at work (Since I work in fast food) I just always remember.. TAKE DEEP BREATHS! lol

[Night Fury]

it might help learning more about small talk and where it's okay to talk about more personal matters

I've actually recently have had to recently learn more about this
a friend of mine pointed out that is why I have a hard time with some friends and not being very social

giving out too much personal information when you first meet someone isn't always a good thing
maybe find some common interest first, joke a little, or something
if the conversation leads to more personal matters, you may want to lightly talk about something or brush over the top of the issue more something again in small talk, don't have to say all the details or issues

It may feel like to you that you aren't giving enough information but it may help and keep people from being embarrassed

watch and observe try to pay more attention to what you say
rather than blurt out the first thing that comes to your mind
it also comes with practice try, if you don't succeed the first time try again later
reading and even watching some shows can also help show small talk
which you can observe...

(when I was told to read more books and to watch some shows for example star trek was one of them, though I do have my limits of watching the show, however, it does help)
it takes time, I've been working on this for months and just recently I've seen results from learning more about small talk and improving social skills and to not over talk about things that would make me feel embarrassed and/or anyone else for that matter

it takes patience, time, practice, reading, studying and understanding to help you know what you should limit yourself to saying
you can do it :)

[Dawn]

I'm not that good when meeting new people myself, like you, I was seen as different by my peers growing up and only bonded with a few other 'outcasts' even through I was on friendly terms with some of the more popular kids.

I always find it hard to find something small to talk about, most people seem to want to know your whole life story in the first meeting and I am not a fan of talking about myself really, maybe after I get to know the person better but I am not huge on gossip which turns alot of people off when meeting me cause most people want to gossip.

Whenever out meeting new people, just think, what do I want this new person to know about me and try to find some common ground, like movies or music. That was how I broke the ice with the two new people I met here after I moved. The first one was a huge fan of horror movies same as me so we got into discussion involving our fav. horror movies.
For the other person, we planned a day out since she was my next neighbour's granddaughter and we ended up discussing about our different schooling and crafts and even through we didn't know each other, we had a total blast and want to do it again sometime soon.

[Kotomi]

that does sound difficult hmm mostly be careful of what you say, maybe set down sometime and talk with your brother about things you should try not talking about or something and maybe try coming up with ideas of what you can say as well

in the end it doesn't matter unless there is a big deal made out of it, in my opinion, however, there are some things that people would appreciate wasn't repeated, if you promise and mark each event in your mind at something you promise not to tell or ones that shouldn't matter it may help

[Avox]

What information were you giving out? If you feel okay sharing it. I think your brother may be going too far. If the other people felt uncomfortable (you can normally tell by how they react to the information you give them), maybe he wasn't. But if you didn't feel that you were and there were no signs that the other people felt that you were, I don't really think it's his place to say you need to change who you are. It seems like maybe you're still finding that person, and it will take a bit of time to fully understand who you are, but I don't think you should try to change the process you're going through because of your brother. =/ Not really sure if any of this makes any sense. XD

[Xun]

Your bro should really calm down and let you meet other people. And yes, it's difficult to come up with other types of subjects to discuss about other than your personal life. Normally, such info is meant for very close friends, so just remember that.

Also-- try discussing things you're interested in. Me and a friend do that. Apparently, we get a lot of people in our conversation.