[SparX]

Being constantly compared to someone else is not healthy for you growing up T.T
No need to apologize for venting things off your mind <3


Personal story on my end

I didn't grow up with any of my siblings, but had a general situation that makes me feel similar to your story T.T
My father always wanted a son (had 5 daughters) so He would constantly tell me even as a child that I wouldn't amount to anything. So I would actively persue hobbies that I thought would make him happy, but he always turned them on me,
Cross country to him was me training for the olympics, and if I wasn't serious about competing I shouldn't play. Writing books only meant that I could author him better stories. I thought about film directing, but he turned into me trying to make him exact replica movies of his favorite books. So on so forth.
The things he never supported me in? Band and Art XD
I also played clarinet at first, but moved on to bass clarinet and saxaphones, dabbled in a few horns and percussion. He attended a total of 5 concerts, and I was in band from 4th till 12th.
He always told me my art would get me nowhere and I was terrible at it anyways. He hated me drawing anime style people too XD
I wasn't held against competition per say, just told that regardless of what I did it wasn't good enough unless it was for him.