[EverAshwood]

I'm so fucking tired of being poor, being constantly broke. I never have the money for bills, barely have money for food now that they took away $100 a month for my food stamps, despite making LESS FUCKING MONEY. I feel like closing my Facebook account because all I ever see is photos of people who have long since stopped talking to me going out, having fun, cosplaying, going to the big con for our area...
And it just reminds me I've always been too broke to have fun, and I always will be.
Too bad I'm too ugly to be a prostitute.

[Kaderin Triste]

Ugh. Having a horrible dilemma that is making me feel sick. Do I give up my only day off in 2 weeks, thereby sacrificing more of my mental health in exvhange for a few extra dollars on my paycheck? Do I agree to go in anyway even though I'm already probably over on hours, which will likely get the manager in trouble all because the assistant manager who makes the schedule is the one who keeps fucking up the scheduling so they're short-handed when we need coverage and over when we don't need it. If I just ignore the call (and text), how do I discretely pick up my schedule for next week (since it wasn't even done and out as of yesterday) without getting conned into working?

[Mekatra]

Trigger Warning: Abuse and Violence

So my husband and I moved in with my parents a several months ago because my mother asked us to. My father and I have never gotten along. He was horribly verbally abusive throughout my life and any time I stood up to him he would smack me across the face, restrict my meals and lock me in my room until the next morning for school. So needless to say, the idea of moving back in with him has been a mental minefield. But my mother begged me for two years to move up here with her, and when we needed to move anyway I relented and we did.

Cut to last night. Dad had been drinking all day, was already pissed off because someone else that he couldn't start shit with had been snarking off to him. He had been needling me all day, calling my transgendered husband the laziest girl he had ever seen, (after we worked all day building a stone retaining wall where the had accidentally broken it with a bulldozer earlier that week) asking me when I was going to start doing some real work... and then I went up to help my mom move something and when I came back he had taken the food I had made for dinner. All of it. Did not leave a SINGLE thing for anyone else despite the fact that I had made enough for four people. I went to go get it from him and grabbed the pan to bring it back down. He followed after me saying if I was going to live under his roof I had to start respecting him and when I tried to hand him a bowl of food in the kitchen telling him to just go away and eat he shoved me against the counter and punched my face. My husband saw this happen and jumped on him and he starts beating my husband across the face. I broke a couple bowls over his head trying to get him to get the hell off of Goat while he's still just wailing on him. My mom and I finally manage to drag him off and my husband and I start up the driveway, going to leave and he follows after me and grabs me again. I fight back until I manage to get away and run up the hill.

We went to a friend's house for the night and my mom came to check on us, letting us know he had thrown all our stuff at the top of the driveway. We haven't gotten a chance to check if he broke our computer or anything else yet. The friend we're staying with is going to let us rent her guest room for a couple months as soon as I find a job.

He took more damage than he did, just a few bruises on the both of us, but I can't even imagine ever speaking to him again after this. I gave him one chance after every one told me he had changed, but he's gotten worse, not better. We're safe for now, but things are a little weird for a while until I get settled into a job and see if our computer is still working.

I'm not asking for sympathy or advice, just needing to tell someone I guess. I was raised to fear the cops, so the thought of calling them never even occurred to me and I sure as hell am not going to do it now.

[Den]

*hugs Mekatra muchly*

[Death by Mirrors]

Tell me if there's something I can do to help. Which, uh... there probably isn't, given the physical distance. But I want you to know there are folks who care for you and hope everything will work out alright, even if just "strangers on the internet".

[Coda]

Geez. O.o;

Unless you live in a city with particularly bad cops, the advice you were given growing up is heavily misguided. In most cities, the cops are upstanding citizens doing their job, and the only time you should need to fear them is when they're yelling at you. (It's true that there are places where the cops have been trained to fear the public, and in those places the cops CAN BE dangerous, especially if you're an intimidating-looking person.) I would really recommend getting the police involved because this kind of behavior shouldn't go unpunished.

Though get your stuff back first. Don't want him breaking it in retaliation. And if you have a big intimidating-looking friend, bring them along, especially if they can dress up looking authoritative. (If they can look like a police officer or security guard, even better, considering your parents are afraid of cops.)

But if you really, really, really can't stomach the thought of getting the police involved, then consider contacting a lawyer. You can sue for personal injury and property damage.

[DreadedMartian]

Today is just a weird day. I don't feel like myself. But this too shall pass.

[KittyBeary]

Just feeling kinda sad but I'll be ok later. :)

[Espy]

Today was a lot of brain issues.

[bluebird]

new bundle and i'm still on my first set >-|o
but at the same time, i know i gotta live w the choices i've made that led me to this point

[Quiet Man Cometh]

Mekatra: I would suggest cops as well. Even if you do not want to press charges (granted that might not be up to you depending on circumstances) you could at least get pictures injuries and such (or do that on your own maybe) for some manner of record later. I would suspect the "cops are bad" thing may even be to ensure you never went.


Burnout happening here. Taking a day off from doing schoolwork even though I'm behind because I'm just dragging myself everywhere.

[DreadedMartian]

99.9% of the time I dont give a damn what others think about me. But sometimes Im so painfully awkard it makes me sad lmfao

[Kaderin Triste]

I am losing my crafting drive. And I don't want to, but my brain is just all blahing and it sucks. I'm just so tired. Someone force me to do things and be productive plz.

[DreadedMartian]

House had a gas leak and whole family had to evacuate the house. Then I find out Stan Lee died and Im just over today.

[Death by Mirrors]

I haven't written anything today and I have zero ideas what I want to happen in my NaNo novel.

[Kaderin Triste]

Very nearly got attacked by some agressive possibly stray dogs! Although it looked like they had collars and tags. So maybe not strays.
Fortunately, I was able to back away safely (they seemed to mostly be acting in a territorial manner). Unfortunately, that meant I had to detour a bit to get home.