Home Forums Shops Trade Avatar Inbox Games Donate
  
Not Logged In
Reply
 
Thread Tools
Awen Moonshine Awen Moonshine is offline
Double Rainbow
Default   #33  
All I wanted was a nice quiet weekend at home the weekend after my birthday, but no... You just have to have your daughters christening that Sunday... If you were going to get her christened then why didn't you get it done sooner? She will be nearly a year old then...

In memory of Dorian Floyd Corkin 18/04/2007 - 31/07/2007

My Dice Store
Last edited by Awen Moonshine; 11-01-2015 at 10:15 PM.
Old Posted 06-23-2015, 04:18 AM Reply With Quote  
Default   #34   Awen Moonshine Awen Moonshine is offline
Double Rainbow
I am increasingly feeling like I am nothing more than a burden to you... I hate living here so far from my family and the people that used to be my friends... I have no-one here and unless you take me somewhere I am trapped inside with no real interaction with other people. But at the same time I am happy that I don't have to see people or interact with strangers on a regular basis. I'm not sure if you or my social anxiety is trapping me more, but I can't live like this forever... I don't know what to do anymore because you seem happy with the way things are. All I feel like doing most days is crying until there are no more tears left. I feel fat, ugly and so alone that it makes me question why you are with me and how could you possibly love me? I wish I could just disappear like I had never even existed...

In memory of Dorian Floyd Corkin 18/04/2007 - 31/07/2007

My Dice Store
Old Posted 09-17-2015, 12:47 PM Reply With Quote  
MyPerfectPigeon MyPerfectPigeon is offline
Dazed
Default   #35  
I've had PTSD since the age of twelve. I finally told my parents about what had happened to me plus all the bullying I endured in school and they told me I was a liar. a liar. I have a clinical diagnosis and take shit tons of medications, but no no I'm just a liar. Even the physical symptoms that I still live through to this day and they bring up how I'm lying constantly. I've tried to kill myself several times because I just can't get a break.
My dad has been an alcoholic for years and among other things, but he won't cut me a break for not knowing my way around a school I've never been to in my life. He calls me an idiot and screams at me for everything and makes me feel worthless.
I don't even know what to do most of the time. Honestly the only escape I've had lately is my religion because no one knows what they're doing to me or they just don't care.
Old Posted 09-19-2015, 11:05 AM Reply With Quote  
Default   #36   contrabandturtlekitty contrabandturtlekitty is offline
Platypus
ok so my lil secret is when i was younger id have nightmares that id die in. id feel the pain of dying physically even after id wake up. which is part of the reason y i never told my family about em and y it took me 9 years to talk about my depression with my family
Old Posted 10-03-2015, 11:52 AM Reply With Quote  
Den Den is offline
Tattooed & foul-mouthed
Default   #37  
at this point, it really wouldn't surprise me if I ended up with a diagnosis of depression. after all the crap I've gone through in the past year alone...between being evicted, being homeless, and then moving back in with abusive family members because I had nowhere else to go...
I use She/Her and They/Them pronouns.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Gallagher
i'm not being biased, den just speaks my language
Roll4It Dice RP Server | Buy me a Ko-Fi? | Make a Nerd's Christmas?
Old Posted 10-04-2015, 07:25 PM Reply With Quote  
Default   #38   Awen Moonshine Awen Moonshine is offline
Double Rainbow
I hope I finally get some form of diagnosis when I go to the doctors today. I can't carry on like this. I'm so tired all the time and I feel like I'm not giving my daughter enough attention because of this. Plus maybe once I have a diagnosis I'll actually be seen as ill enough to deserve some form of money other than what I'm struggling to make through my etsy store...

In memory of Dorian Floyd Corkin 18/04/2007 - 31/07/2007

My Dice Store
Old Posted 10-27-2015, 06:15 AM Reply With Quote  
contrabandturtlekitty contrabandturtlekitty is offline
Platypus
Default   #39  
i like a guy that is taken but yet also splitting up with the woman hes with :/ part of me wants him while the other part of me just feels like hes going to hurt me like how i have been hurt :/
Old Posted 11-01-2015, 08:00 PM Reply With Quote  
Default   #40   Awen Moonshine Awen Moonshine is offline
Double Rainbow
I'm now beyond low... I hate my life as it is. I am in almost constant pain, I never have any money and I am trapped where I am. I am stuck living in a place I don't feel comfortable with no real support network. As much as I love my partner, I am not in love with him and never have been. I want to leave but I have nowhere else to go and I wouldn't be able to cope with looking after our daughter on my own. I can barely look after myself as is. But I cannot leave her with him either as he works and is not as understanding as I am. I don't mean that in a nasty way, but he snaps at her over the smallest of things that I would either ignore or laugh at. I don't trust other people and live miles from my family, although they don't feel much like a family to me anymore. I only see them on their birthdays and around holidays, if that and when I do see them it feels as if they can't wait to get rid of me. I feel unwanted everywhere I go and my social anxiety makes it practically impossible to meet new people. I wish I'd never been pregnant and been forced to move here. I wish I had been a better granddaughter so my nan hadn't gotten so stressed and had her stroke... She's not been the same since and I know it's all my fault. I wish I'd never wanted to know who my dad was... I wish he was rotting in jail for eternity for all he's done, not free to live his life like nothing had happened. I wish I could just be like everyone else for once, and not have to live my life in pain and fear, restricted beyond all hope. I wish I could be the old me. The me from before all the crap. Start again from when I was 12...

In memory of Dorian Floyd Corkin 18/04/2007 - 31/07/2007

My Dice Store
Old Posted 11-01-2015, 10:15 PM Reply With Quote  
Nila Nila is offline
Harmless
Default   #41  
Being pushed aside and forgotten by your own mother hurts like nothing else.
I can't wait to move away from here. I can't stand her.
Old Posted 11-02-2015, 01:00 AM Reply With Quote  
Default   #42   Awen Moonshine Awen Moonshine is offline
Double Rainbow
Why am I having near constant anxiety attacks...? Am I putting too much pressure on myself because of trying to run my business and make things for my family too...? I need time to focus and get everything done, but time is running out fast...

In memory of Dorian Floyd Corkin 18/04/2007 - 31/07/2007

My Dice Store
Old Posted 12-01-2015, 11:00 AM Reply With Quote  
Nari Nari is offline
The Artsy One
Default   #43  
I have an irrational fear of dentists that has only grown worse as I have gotten older. It is not because I'm afraid of what they'll say. I know my teeth aren't great. I can't place it. But I know it is bad enough now, that I will avoid going altogether unless I have a serious issue happening, and even then, I need to go to the doctor first and get beta blockers. It's such a bad fear that I feel a panic attack starting right now, so I'm gonna stop talking about it and hug my fluffy Cthulu.
Old Posted 12-01-2015, 04:35 PM Reply With Quote  
Default   #44   Awen Moonshine Awen Moonshine is offline
Double Rainbow
You just don't understand me, it's as simple as that, you just don't want to admit it...

I wish I didn't have such a large family, especially around this time of year. I put so much effort into getting/making them all nice presents for little to nothing in return every time. I just can't stop myself and I get into such a state of panic and anxiety that I struggle with on a daily basis. But none of you seem to care nor even so much as thank me for all the effort I put in and money I can't afford...

I'm really not coping well with things right now. I need a break from the little one, by the afternoon I often find myself loosing it with her, then feeling bad about having to tell her off. This is even worse on days that she decides she doesn't need to have her afternoon nap... I feel like such a failure...

In memory of Dorian Floyd Corkin 18/04/2007 - 31/07/2007

My Dice Store
Old Posted 12-18-2015, 05:38 AM Reply With Quote  
Awen Moonshine Awen Moonshine is offline
Double Rainbow
Default   #45  
How is it that I can always seem to accrue decent amounts of online money and hoard it, yet I am unable to do the same IRL... I am once again totally broke and no-one seems to want to buy what I make... I feel like I should give it all up, but then I wouldn't have any chance of getting the extra money I need... In the end all I really end up doing is curling up and crying silently to myself...

In memory of Dorian Floyd Corkin 18/04/2007 - 31/07/2007

My Dice Store
Old Posted 10-30-2016, 04:52 PM Reply With Quote  
Default   #46   Den Den is offline
Tattooed & foul-mouthed
There's a couple of reasons I don't tell you or Dad when I'm not feeling good. The first is that both of you tend to dismiss it and accuse me of laziness. The second is that I seem to recall a certain someone saying that they wouldn't help me with any more bills even if I asked.
I use She/Her and They/Them pronouns.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Gallagher
i'm not being biased, den just speaks my language
Roll4It Dice RP Server | Buy me a Ko-Fi? | Make a Nerd's Christmas?
Old Posted 10-30-2016, 10:21 PM Reply With Quote  
Poggio Poggio is offline
Bald and loving it!
Default   #47  
I am on a downward oscillating ride of depression. I am tired of being a rock and at times cannot help but care for other people. I am trying to let them fix themselves. Especially when someone needs to figure out things them selves. I am really, really fucking sick of being a rock.

I am paranoid being both a woman and a minority in a red state where wearing a hoodie or sitting in a car or walking down the street may kill you.

People are crazy. I want my Internet back.
Old Posted 10-31-2016, 05:59 PM Reply With Quote  
Default   #48   Buschbabe Buschbabe is offline
Platypus
I have a crush on a guy who is local but I'm afraid to tell him because he's the most positive, upbeat guy I know and I feel fat and ugly so I wont let him know I like him.
Old Posted 11-02-2016, 09:44 AM Reply With Quote  
Reply

Tags
secret


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All content is copyright © 2010 - 2024 Trisphee.com
FAQ | E-Mail | Terms of Service | Privacy Policy | Forum Rules
Twitter | Facebook | Tumblr
Return to top
Powered by vBulletin®