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Arsis_von_Neaera · Posted 01-24-2012, 06:40 PM

Well, that's because I'm broad. It's more an attempt at ambiguity than it is clever.

Interesting comments though.

"My Arsis" does it's job.

"In the end of things..." the third repetition has some very weak lines. I agree. Especially the burning birth control one. (was rather funny in my mind)

"A demons frown..." reminds me of a poem I wrote that I can't seem to locate, which is a shame. This one is metaphorical for the vices I've suffered during my travels and the redeeming qualities of my past experiences in comparison. The one I'm trying to locate uses stronger imagery to describe a similar inspiration. This one I wrote in Egypt, I'm trying to find my poem from Sudan.

		#14	Arsis_von_Neaera THIS. IS. SPAR -shot- ... gurgle
Well, that's because I'm broad. It's more an attempt at ambiguity than it is clever. Interesting comments though. "My Arsis" does it's job. "In the end of things..." the third repetition has some very weak lines. I agree. Especially the burning birth control one. (was rather funny in my mind) "A demons frown..." reminds me of a poem I wrote that I can't seem to locate, which is a shame. This one is metaphorical for the vices I've suffered during my travels and the redeeming qualities of my past experiences in comparison. The one I'm trying to locate uses stronger imagery to describe a similar inspiration. This one I wrote in Egypt, I'm trying to find my poem from Sudan. Maybe it's a condition, ever think of that? No, no you didn't. You never thought, "oh maybe he's sensitive about his invisible eyes." Maybe it's a skin condition. "Maybe she was born with it..."
	Posted 01-24-2012, 06:40 PM