[Suzerain of Sheol]

Not to be an edgelord, but it's been so long since I could feel happiness, at some point I even lost the sense of desiring it without even realizing it had slipped away. I feel like an emotional zombie most of the time these days. Fear seems to be the only sensation that ever really spikes high enough for me to notice.

It's one of those situations where it doesn't even feel actively bad or wrong because I'm so acclimated to it, to the point where even seeing examples like this thread of other, healthier people trying to tap into that human need for joy in their life really throws me off and makes me realize how realize how deep the pit I've fallen into is.

If only I were capable of caring about that....