[Fey]

well...I don't know how to put this but bluntly, so my appologies ahead of time.

You have missed a bit of the point of Suzerain of Sheol reply. I still have no idea if your world is a world of technology or magic? Elves or tree-people? Are your vehicles six legged horses or steam powered cars? Here, let me redo your intro and show you a couple ways you could present this to make it more interesting:

Welcome to the planet Leroya, a world rich in magicks and legends. The story begins in the oldest city Auyn where the House of Mages was first founded, and where most quests are sent forth. Their goal is to find the city of legend, Eden, a land filled with treasure and danger. Join a party and see what great destiny awaits you, here on Leroya.

Or, if you're not into magic....

Leroya, the hot spot in the galaxy for the latest in technology, has run into a problem. The 'lost' city of Eden has been once more targeted by the many moon's treasure hunters and they gather in the main city of Auyn. The local authorities are swamped with false treasure maps, and 'guides' to take the silly and hopeful on a quest for this lost land. But, some whisper, there may be some truth to the rumors, and a few groups may have in fact found the way there....

by indicating a bit more about the world you indicate a bit more about the over all feel you want. think about that and maybe adjust your intro. All the details on the various people you meet will then be flavoured by that. Hope this helps