Quote:
Originally Posted by Voidbarker
okay, got another phone call and it's been pushed back to next wednesday because i didn't have the papers on hand at the time.
also, i gingerly inform somebody that what they're saying might come off as transmisogynistic (i.e: the whole 'is f*mboy a slur' thing). they proceed to be a fucking dick. (a dick as in 'wheeeeeh this makes me uncomfortable! wheeeeeh challenging my biases is uncomfortable!')
i've had to correct the same fucking person on misgendering wx-78 before. multiple times. and they either throw a tantrum or continue misgendering them. and then, of course, i'm the one that gets bitched at. there's no actions taken on this one guy's part, i'm the one that has to receive a lovely little warning that the admin of an rp server is getting tired of it.
i fucking hate the don't starve fanbase.
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I got to the point where I had to consciously choose to stop being offended by stuff.
The world is a crappy place, and when it comes down to it the things other people say are just words. Words have meaning, of course, but it reflects more on the person saying them than the person hearing them. And if I don't care about a crappy person, then why should I assign any value to the crappy words they say? That only serves to hurt myself more. Crappy people are crappy people, and I can't fix them, so it's not worth sacrificing my own well-being to try.
And if they're not a crappy person, then the only harm is that they used the wrong words for what they actually meant, or they'd gotten the wrong idea about something through no wrongdoing of their own. In either case, that's just a mistake, one that
anyone can make, and it's something that can be managed without making the damage any worse. Giving that mistake too much weight just hurts me for something that could have been resolved without the extra pain.
I'm not perfect about it. There are still a few things that push my buttons before I have a chance to make a conscious decision about it, and if I'm already worn down it can be hard to take the step to set it aside. But I've found that the better I get at recognizing when it's not worth the effort, the less often I get worn down like that. It leaves me with more spoons to deal with the things that matter more, like taking care of the people I love or addressing my own issues instead of other people's.