[Kory]

I hear you, Merskelly!

I'd been hospitalized quite a few times, but once I was out of high school I always kinda felt that maybe my "mental illness" wasn't that bad... I was in several schizophrenia group therapies and I remember sitting in group, thinking to myself, 'I'm NOT going to be lazy! Taking help from family/government and not having a job is the EASY way out! I'm going to work as hard as I can because I'm FINE'

I always took those group therapies for granted.

I got a "real" job in 2014 working at a childcare center... and go figure, my mental health plummeted. I was hospitalized at least twice every three months and it got to the point where I was missing too much work from constant hospitalizations and I had piles of bills from the hospital not to mention my therapy bills and my damn medication cost like $1k/month.

My group therapist pulled me aside from group once and suggested that I try for SSI/SSDI and at first I fought against it because I was brainwashed into thinking that unless I was making my own money, that that meant I was useless. She said that I was struggling and that is was good of me to try to work, but it was obvious that the bills were piling up and kept getting bigger and bigger each time I went IP.

She and my other therapist helped me apply and I'm very grateful that they did. Now I can actually afford my medication and I was able to pay off most of the hospital and therapy bills.


I can't imagine working at a job that's stressful like that for years and years without having a mental breakdown.
I know the only reason I was hired at the childcare (I originally thought it was because I am good with kids and because I was really over-qualified) was because they were desperate because no one ever stayed working there more than a year at a time... So I thought I was special, but nah. They literally would have hired ANYONE... and they have hired randos and people who were clearly under-qualified...

Working a "normal" job is super stressful!
And so is going to school, IMHO. I'm always impressed by people who go to school and have mental illnesss.