[Merskelly Metalien]

:D *raises hand* I'd just like to say, I am super aesthetically attracted to Espy's vampire Avi! >w>; and I want to throw a little vampire party for them with like, bats and cake and I dunno, velvet wine glasses? x}

Asexuality as I've researched it is something that seems to fit with me. :] Much like other folks I just never got why everyone was having feelings for boys and girls as they matured and went through puberty. :/ It's not like something is wrong with me libido-wise or I don't get aroused or anything. I can say I do. :[ I just can't understand what's attractive about people..and it always sorta made me feel like some freak anomaly without the knowledge of who is hot and who is not. :[ It never seemed important to me to know either. I figured people got to know each other first and then became attracted, like I did. I think I'm more Demisexual, but I'm still Ace as it's under the umbrella. :] I dunno, I go back and forth. <x/ It's not something I can help or force. :] I think I get Asexuals more than I get Heterosexuals when they speak about crushes. I only ever faked crushes growing up. <u<; Just so people moved past me.
I didn't even realize asexuality until I couldn't figure out why I wasn't happy with hugging, cuddling and kissing my ex bf. :[ Even after knowing him for 2 years. I tried to feel something sexual but I realized I was faking it to make him happy and that wasn't really good of me. <n>;
Most aces I've talked to or met typically mention the feeling of being broken. :[ Like I'm broken and everyone else is at least working. And why am I broken, how can I get fixed? <:} I'm just glad I have had better experiences with ace communities with similar experiences and have comfort for one another.
I'm a hugger and a cuddler, but in small doses here and there. x}
I'm a great kisser but I don't feel comfortable with it. >:/
And I'm not sex repulsed when it comes to fiction as much as I am more repulsed irl. o_o; Sex just no. Just no. It's not necessary for me and my life. xD Soory.
But I respect if anyone likes it tho. :} It just sounds really overrated to me is all. x] I'd rather share stories and pictures with the person I love. ^w^ In a way, it's kinda cute? <x]
Anyway, Just wanted ta share. I'mma leave now.
>:D You're awesome Espy!~