[Espy]

The first time I heard the vegetable oil story was over a Skype call.

Now, most oldbies on Tris know this, but, my parents and I don't see eye-to-eye on the whole Internet thing. They don't exactly approve of videogames, talking to "strangers", what have you. (Let's ignore the fact that I am quite of age.)

So it's Salone, Suze, Galla, Quiet (was Quiet there? I forget. She might have gone to sleep), and me. I've got one earbud in so I can hear my parents coming, and the lot of us are on Guild Wars, running around the PvP area for no particular reason.

Salone is drunk off his fucking ass.

This also happens to be the first time I've introduced him to the concept of using gender-neutral pronouns to refer to me.

And to make it worse, everything I want to say, has to be typed into the chatbox.

So we're running around, trying to figure out what's climbable and what's /actual wall/, and just jumping around the entire place, with Suze and Galla going "wait WHO?!" every time Salone screw up pronouns, when Salone goes --

"Have I ever told you about that time I had to slather my naked grandfather in vegetable oil?"

Or, you know, something of that general nature, because that was literally almost a year ago.

"...You what?"

"Wait, wait, I have to tell you this."

"Ooooookay...?"

And off he launches into storytelling.

Less than three minutes in, Suze loses it and starts guffawing over Skype. Galla's wheezing. I'm doing my utter best to not crack up because that miiight raise suspicions.

What ensues is this: Suze laughs more in the following half hour than I've ever seen him laugh for the entire then-2.5 years I'd known him, Galla is /sure/ Salone's exaggerating, and I actually stop jumping from pillar to pillar for once and have to un-earbud from time to time because the three of them are apparently all doubled over wheezing that I can't hear my parents at all. There's a shitload of pronoun correcting from both Suze and Galla, and almost-uncomfortably profuse apologizing from Salone, and me struggling too much to hide my laughter to care the slightest bit. Salone cracks up so much while recounting the entire debacle that the story takes much longer than necessary to tell.

And to this day, that still might be the best session of Guild Wars we've ever had :|