[Suzerain of Sheol]

Indulgence for the Devil

The soul forced to unfold like a nautilus
a reverse of evolution
aspiring to the ocean like lust for Heaven
Prometheus rising from the rock
Ignorance of ashes
I was walking on water

The storm sprayed names like bullets
lightning indictments, one upon the other
but we were deaf to fear
too dead to hear

A cadaver writhing on the slab
jacked into the zeitgeist
leaking moral fiber where the blood ran dry
these scarred bones could spell out the death of purpose

I can scream old thoughts with annihilating fascination
I can dream incineration and aurora
I want to be enthralled by the Sun
I want to raise suicides from their graves

But my feet begin to sink
and existence collapses onto me
my placebo nightmare falling apart
God is over on the shore, masturbating

Now kneeling on the ocean floor
raped by Wisdom until I scream that it is Love
denied my appeal to a coma
too traumatized for tears
a paralyzed smile
Still sinking
It hurts like being born

I would elect a brain-dead king
and vote for my own death-support
I would crawl to Golgotha
only to die before they could raise me to the cross

Wrapped up like a drowning foetus
silently begging for my abortion
I can't hold myself together
Detonating with the cosmos

This soul swimming with a limp
vomited from the eddies
a poor decision
burning the curtain to life's pageantry

They put a tourniquet on Eternity
and I fell off, gasping for blood
the poisoned apple of genius
inspiration to nothing

I remain the death of names
a conscious still-birth
retroactive regret
and a passive genocide

The water was a meaningless metaphor
I subsist by lying to myself

You'd think I'd run out of ways to say I hate myself, eventually. And yet...

This one was kind of fun to write. Not sure what that says.