[Quiet Man Cometh]

This is not bad. It's written well enough I think, though some of the phrases border a little on cliche, but not quite. They just feel very familiar. I like the paragraph here:

Elijah hesitated and then stepped through the doorway and into that dangerous red room. His breath caught in his throat, and he stared down at the ground as he shuffled forward. He stopped in front of the desk and thrust the paper out in front of him, an offering. There was a creak from Micah’s chair and a following creak from the desk. The paper disappeared from the boy’s fingers.

This I like because you only have the creaks of the desk and the paper missing from his hand to get an idea of what Micah is doing. It's a good example of the "show, don't tell" philosophy that people often talk about.

Micah watched the door for a moment, as if expecting the boy to come back, and then reached into the wastebasket and retrieved the discarded picture. - I think for this paragraph here, it would be benficial if you removed the "as if" sentence. I think just having Micah watching the door would show the reader that something is up it him, without you haveing to say why. It's another showing/telling thing.

I do like the plot by the way. It's simple, and I think you establish the characters and their relationship well in the small space you chose to do it in. I like it. :)