[Mizeria]

actually it wasn't that bad of an experience, being smashed i mean.
I remember 95% of it.. and even tho it was not a good moment for me... my friends had a good laugh.... and i laugh about it now.

And... I always planned on never drinking.
but things changed when my ex- room mate turned 21... and then.. well i didn't drink again until I was 21 a couple month later... and right now.. i'm about... a week sober
as weird as that is... and thats only cause i'm been at dennys all week

ha, tony is something else.
Idk if there is interest there... idk if I want there to be interest there
I just know I like hangin out at dennys while he is working cause I can just forget everything..

and I'm sure if I went to a bar I would explain to him that I might freak out a bit..
and try to explain why...
without making him turn into 'ima gonna kill some people'
cause he seems like the overly protective guy.. even if I am just a friend.

oh god yes, a DD or make sure the bar tender takes the keys and has the address written down for my house for a taxi
xDD

I don't want life to be easier, per say, I just want to stop dragging everyone I care about down with me... does that make sense?
Its like, when I talk about my depression... its like they feel bad, all the time. so I stop talking about it and then they freak...
so its a no win.. for me at all...

which in turn makes me feel worse for causing so many problems.