Granted, but they're not of interest to you or anyone else


I wish for a DS

Granted. But it's the upcoming 3DS, and your 3d glasses don't work.

I wish for a pizza.

Granted, but it's really Pizza the Hut and he makes a big mess


I wish for some soda

Granted. But your patented 'three tap' method doesn't stop the wave of cooling soda coating your face.

I wish for no headache.

Granted, but your head explodes


I wish for a PKE(?) meter from Ghostbusters

Granted. But the nuclear power needed for it is banned in every country.

I wish my wife would wake up :/

Granted, but she's very cranky


I wish for some cake

Granted, but the cake is a lie.

I wish for new clothes.

Granted, but they're in tatters


I wish for my own Quantum Singularity gun

Granted. But you accidentally divide my zero.

I wish for something good to watch on tv.

Granted, but you're completely lost in the storyline


I wish for a new bed

Granted, but it is made of granite.

I wish for a kitten.

Granted, but it's a demon-kitty and tries to scratch your eyes out


I wish for a new bike

Granted, but it is a BMX bike and has those metal things sticking out of the side.

I wish for a new job.

Granted, but it's a Wal-mart


I wish for a scanner

Granted, but the little bulb is broken.

I wish I could have some 'alone time' with my wife.