Granted but since you no longer sleep u go insane and kill people and make cats into clothings and talk like the mad hatter and yoda

I wish i had an eevee army that would do as i say x3

The Eevees, you say? They do so mimble on and voice many a conjabbernith, wouldn't you say dear? I fear their voice so greatly echellerates the land, that you fall head over heel over head and heel again into a grifflescrub patch. Quite a sad fate.

I wish I may for my inscrumbulousness to go away.

Granted, but the only version of inscrumbulousness that goes away is the one result on Google (which incidentally is this page!), so the wish goes away and creates an incredibly awkward paradox upon itself, causing a major headache to all who try to figure it out right before imploding the universe through the rip in space and time it has created.

I wish for a physical copy of the movie Love at First Bite!

GRANTED!! but with the cost that you are thrown into its world and u end up being sucked dry as a christmas meal!
I wish my computer would download faster!!!

Granted, but your computer was so fast it continued to download over 100%

No wish?
Well, I guess Illusion is now trapped in the mind of his bird.

I do wish for hugs.

Granted, but the hug was given by a slime so now you're all slimey (and maybe smelly, too).

I wish for my work places to not be so far away. ;<

Granted. You work at home now. All the time. No more silly breaks! Back to the eternal work!

I wish for the opposite of what I actually want.

Granted but what you thought you didn't want was something you wanted so you don't get anything because that is the opposite of what you wanted not wanted and that is your wish.

I wish for like crackers or something

And lo! The great beast of the Aether, with five thousand tongues and one thousand eyes, came fourth upon the land. Its gaze reduced all to compressed wheat and yeast, and visited the vengeance of crops upon the arrogant peoples! All hail the tertiary coming of the end times! All hail Crackers and be made bread of its bread!

...I wish for a wish.

Granted, but the wish is corrupted, which brings you right back...here!

I wish to be the ultimate champion of air hockey.

Granted, but air hockey soon becomes a competitive sport which you partake in. The air hockey mob was betting against you and told you to lose, but because of the magic of your skills you ultimately won. The mob then ties you up, cement your feet in concrete, and throws you into a middle of some lake. You die from the lack of air.

I wish Trisphee was owned by a bunny rabbit named Samantha.

Granted, but it's Samantha the Play Boy Bunny, and as part of her agreement with them, it is now managed by Play Boy, and so tons of lonely older males flock to the site but end up sticking around to read the articles.

I wish...to not have to work on Thanksgiving!

Granted. However, Samantha employed user silencing tactics and raised the bar on runes to Gaia levels. Then, after buying items, the Bunny gnawed on the memory system, losing your user data. Because Samantha is a bunny from another country, most attempts at suing her are made complex and more expensive.

In conclusion, Samantha removes the Item Exchange and makes all shop items rune items.


Salone Ninja'ed me!


Granted. Thanksgiving no longer exists.


I wish for brains.

(That is the best outcome I could ask for)

Granted, but it's a whole pile of brains. Without a, you know, head, they flop everywhere and become tainted by bacteria and the elements and are of no use to you, except maybe as a gruesome packing material or the most metal ball to toss around at a concert.

I wish for a pizza!

(Again, that was what I was hoping for! Horrorfest Yes!)

Whenever you hear a truck go by,
Beware, beware, the Pizza Guy,
With a billed hat, and striped suit,
He will come with a bowl of fruit,
Within the fruit, there lies - there lies,
The meat of diced meat of bready pies,
A whitened fungus grows over the crust,
And blood flows out like week-old rust,
And watch the bowl fill with flies!
And that's what you get when you call pizza guys!

granted but the topping fell off getting it home and now there is pizza gunk in the passenger seat of your car and not on your pizza



i wish my art commissions would space out better so that instead of 50 dollars in three days then no work for the rest of the week i would get one or two a day throughout the week

granted but he drank it while you were awake instead


i wish my cat was not bitey

Granted, but it's cooked by the home, so it sits on a plate awkwardly becoming room temperature before being served to you. By the home. It's horrifying really and makes your insurance skyrocket.

I wish for a TT-33 Tokarev!

Granted but it backfires and gives you a nasty black eye!

I wish I could sleep!!

Granted, but you can't from the sound of me whining about getting beaten up by my favorite firearm!

I wish for more time. More time to do things.

Granted but now your are immortal and watch all you love die!

I wish I had money

pfffft he is already like that X''D


granted but it's all in bonds and cannot be used


i wish my shoulders would stop aching

Granted, but they're cold socks that leech heat from you!

I wish for Louis XIV to release a new album!

Granted, but you are rendered unable to actually do it due to multiple unrelated events, thereby forever setting you back.

I wish I could become a pilot!

granted but it is because you are asked to babysit a dozen small children for a week

i wish that i could come up with a wish that could not be corrupted

granted but the syrup contains no raspberry and has a mild aftertaste of purple


i wish i had a shiny nickel

Granted, but it's so shiny that it is blinding to look at and you lose your eyesight, and it becomes an experience where people can only look upon it if they wish to never see again.

I wish to not go to work!

Granted, but a meteorite lands on your town destroying everything except your work place.


I wish I can open up a RPG message prompt and by pressing okay I can learn all the contents, words, and knowledge in the book by letter and understand it completely.

Granted but now everywhere you look all you can see is words and it drives you crazy!

I wish I had a back with no pain.

Granted, but it's someone else's back and it comes with 25% APR financing.

I wish this stupid Baker Brothers location would open again!

Granted! The Bakery has been reopened by the Manson family!

I wish for today to be like the other days of my life. Not having too much of that "jump out of your skin at everything all the time" feeling.

Granted!
Your day is anxiety free...but you broke your toe by stubbing it on the bed frame.


I wish I could poop glitter!

(Broken toe in exchange for no anxiety? Gimme!)

Granted! You are now a glitter-machine. You are no longer human.

I wish my friend was going to be okay...