Could be you! A shy red panda but secretly... a badass metal singer.

So, my voice is actually really flat and has a pretty narrow range (about a C3, B2 if I push it, to a C5 — used to be able to hit an E5). I could potentially learn how to do a metal growl, on account of the pitch of my voice and how hoarse it naturally is, but without proper techniques, that could damage my vocal cords even further. (My theory as to why my voice is a bit janky is that my larynx and trachea were mildly damaged when I had heart surgery as an infant due to prolonged usage of a feeding tube.)

Nooo D:
At least you already have a tragic backstory

...-exasperated eyeroll-

watch me wake up dead stabbed by a USB tomorrow

The bluntness of a USB make it extremely difficult to be used as a stabbing weapon.

...However, this “sword” is capable of shooting a beam of electrical energy (?), so electrocution and incineration are definitely options.

AND RUIN MY OUTFIT?
Please, a death that shows off my look

...Broken neck?

That is acceptable!
Also a quick death

If you throw her off a building, she'll achieve that super awkward posing that is used in editorial modeling. Which would be perfect for showing off the outfit.

Not necessarily. Depending on the height of the building, things could... go splat.

We need a physics expert in this evildoers meeting

There’s a pretty famous photo out there of a lady who jumped from a very high building and landed on a car. The car was dented really bad by the impact, but due to the angle at which she fell, her body was picturesque. When paramedics tried to pick her up, though, her body basically disintegrated.

I remember there being a Marc Jacobs ad, or maybe a different designer, that had a photo which was obviously inspired by that one. It was rather weird to see it used that way.

Probably beautiful, yes, but also unnervingly morbid, when you think about it.

Yeah, Alexander McQueen is a designer who excelled at making beautiful yet morbid designs. He was one of my favorites.