(...why do people always assume stuff like melting my family is a bad thing? Oh, and we don't have an annual Christmas party, just to let you know.)

Granted, but you are constantly asked for too much and expend the last of your fat and eventually die of the same malnutrition you saved others from.

I wish I knew how to ride a Pogo stick.

Granted, but once you stary pogo-ing you cannot ever stop.

I wish I could drive

Granted. You can now drive hovercars. Too bad there aren't any of those around.

I wish to get an A on all my exams.

Granted, but you get Fs on all of your homework assignments.

I wish I had goldfish.

Alright, and imagine your surprise when you find that it can sing in English! Unfortunately, it can only sing the song you hate the most over and over again.

I wish I could fly.

Granted, but only on weekends and you have to take off of airplane landing/takeoff pads.

I wish that all of my school work for this semester was completely done with myself having passed. 8D

You passed. But none of those classes actually counted for credit.

I wish for world peace 0n0

Alright, humanity goes extinct.

I wish I could speak Finnish fluently.

Granted, but while you were learning you said something terribly offensive and no other Finnish speakers which to talk with you.

I wish that my puppy was potty-trained to go outside. xD

Granted, but now it stays outside for 45 minutes, pissing you off that it's taking so long.

I wish I wasn't so depressed all the time.

Okay, you now switch from severely depressed to deliriously happy and back every 24 hours, no matter what's going on in your life.

I wish I could actually visit the stars and planets I so enjoy studying.

granted, but you knew too much you got yourself into space dementia

I wish I were taller.

Granted, but in order to be taller, you had to be born with gigantism, which means you'll die/have died in your twenties, having not much of a life lived.

I wish I had a pet genie.

Granted, but he still only can grant three wishes with the typical rules of no wishing for more wishes or for love.

I wish that I was not sick.

Granted but now you are never able to get sick the down fall is that you are now a carrier of all diseases and get everyone around you sick.

I wish to be warm at all times.

Granted. You are now perpetually on fire, even in death. The downside is that no one can bury you. The upside is that you get a free cremation.

I wish I could piss fire.

granted, but then your pee-pee burns after 3 pisses. xD


I wish I weren't bored right now.

Granted, but now you're so depressed you kill yourself.

I wish my pee-pee hadn't burnt off in the last wish.

Granted, but you don't pee fire anymore. Instead ice : D and it freezes off

I wish I had a better job.

granted but you get too stressed


I wish I were asleep now

Granted, but now you never wake.

I wish I could piss both fire and ice at the same time.

Alright, but this causes a thermal shock reaction and let's just say the results aren't pretty. D:

I wish humans had time travel and used it responsibly.

Granted. However, though humans used their time travelling abilities responsibly, there were still mistakes made. Mistakes which, unfortunately, caused every human to have ever lived at the time of the mistake and any after to cease to exist for all eternity.

I wish there would be another Dark Knight movie, this time with The Penguin, Mr. Freeze, Poison Ivy, Harlequin, and any remaining villains that had not yet been done in said Dark Knight series so far.

Granted. However, though humans used their time travelling abilities responsibly, there were still mistakes made. Mistakes which, unfortunately, caused every human to have ever lived at the time of the mistake and any after to cease to exist for all eternity.

I wish there would be another Dark Knight movie, this time with The Penguin, Mr. Freeze, Poison Ivy, Harlequin, and any remaining villains that had not yet been done in said Dark Knight series so far.

Granted. It's a stop-motion Christmas-themed movie.

I wish to get over my writer's block.

Granted. However, everything you write now is a piece of garbage.

I really wish I could understand what my dreams were telling my subconscious.

granted, but then you think you're sigmund freud

I wish my back didn't hurt

Granted. Now your face hurts so badly that you try and rip it off, thus killing yourself in the process.

I wish people weren't greedy.

Granted, but then everyone is so nice to one another, they all end up hating one another.

I wish I could finish this scarf.

(...how does that even make sense, Muse?)

Granted. It looks terrible, however.

I wish I had more music on my iPod.

Granted. It's all in Finnish.

I wish I could control time.

granted, but then it turns into a kaliedoscope


I wish I had a siberian husky

Granted, but they never stop howling.

I wish that I was done and have passed finals already.

Granted, but for the rest of your life you have random jumps forward in time. You never remember what happens during these time jumps, and from what you can gather a different personality takes over. This unknown personality proves itself to be brilliant but is extremely mean-spirited. This frequently brings people who want revenge and answers for actions you don't remember at all.

I wish I could test at least one myth with the Mythbusters. Even if it would drive me crazy because of the crush I have on Kari Byron. >.>

Granted, but it happens to be a myth that winds up going wrong and causes your untimely death.

I wish I was a kangaroo.

Granted, but you are a kangaroo now

i wish for all the pie in the world

granted, but they're all giant pies and you get smooshed by the first one and never get to enjoy the rest. :s-laugh:

I wish for more moneeeeeeeeey.

Granted, but you're given nothing but Zimbabwe currency. Gratz you're a billionaire, but the 10 billion dollar bill there is worth less than the paper it's printed on.

I wish for an anti corruption shield for any sort of future wish related activities.

Granted but your age is now 1 years old to act as a cute shield

i wish i was love by all