Granted, now time slows to a crawl and you go insane.

I wish my math homework would do itself.

Granted but now you don't get any credit for it

I wish there was something on TV

Granted, but its a blood thirsty monster that escapes and maws you to shreds.

I wish the wind would stop blowing.

Granted but now it floods because the winds were blowing away clouds

I wish my face would stop hurting

granted but now something else hurts
i wish i wasn't sick

Granted, but you cease to have any feeling and don't realize you are on fire.

I wish octopi had feathers.

granted but now they can fly and took over the world
i wish it was time for sakura-con already

Granted but you can't go.

I wish that I had a job.

Granted, but they don't pay you anything.

I wish I didn't have to write a speech.

Granted but now you have to write a 50 page paper

I wish I could motivate myself to do art

Granted, but your motivation wasn't good enough so you didn't get far into drawing art.

I wish 100 new members would join trisphee and treat me like i'm their god.

Granted, but then they figure out you were in disguise and sacrifice you to their real god.. XD

I wish I didn't have a headache

Granted, you now don't have a head, thus eliminating the ache. =D

I wish Pokemon were real.

Granted, but they eat you.
I wish the weekend was longer.

Granted but now you have to work/go to school over the weekend

I wish I had straight hair

Granted but it falls off.

I wish I could make cool graphics