It's approximately 3 university level college papers about the psyche of reward in adolescence. and 9 shoelaces.

What should I do with all this trash laying around?

Become the trashmaster, master of the trash.

How do I make a silly question that will garner a very serious answer?

Don't use your brain to make the question.

Who is the lady in the picture, The Mona Lisa?

there is no picture.

How do I become a crab?

First you relocate to the tropical forest and live in a tree until you fall asleep.
When you hit the ground, you shall be reborn as a crab. Then you shake your tree until coconuts fall from the top. Take them and consume them for your new crustacean shell to get stronger. Chew and spit out sand and make a castle, if you want to be royalty, AKA the KING Crab. King of crabs. This is how to be a crab.

Where do I get my tire changed?

In that dark, suspicious backalley your mom warned you about. Of course the place doesn't look very welcoming at first glance, but it's only because they saved on decorations and advertising so they can offer you killer prices.

What makes a good gift to put into an advent calendar?

A beehive with glitter all over it!

How do I travel to Spain by myself?

Recruit bees. So many bees.

How do I become a robot?

Well, you know how computers have a cd tray? Put a cd inside you with an robot program iso!!!


What's the fastest way to cross a river?

You throw enough stones into a river that read "Faith Hope Love", that river will definitely become cross.

How do I ride a bike to school?

put it on the hood of a car. Preferably a big one.
Pad it. Then you give it a ride to the school.


How can I tell how old is the earth?

Take a handful of dirt and taste it. If it's sour, then the earth is likely expired, and you'll need to throw it away and buy a fresh one.

How do I get my dog to stop pooping places?

Well, now that's very easy!! Duct tape its bum!! HAAAA, take that atheists


How do I memorize my own cell phone number?

You'll never forget your cellphone number if it's tattooed to your hand! xD

What's the best way to send a million dollars to my friend?

Obviously in quarters. Each quarter taped to a carrier pigeon. Have you ever heard about a pigeon in jail??? But mail carriers... or being robbed in person... The bank...


How can I focus enough to read a full book next week?

Bring your friends over, maybe they will help you read.

How can I be less lazy?