Granted, because said finger never existed!

I wish I could read minds!

Granted, but the dirty thoughts of the elderly are the loudest thoughts.

I wish I wasn't lactose intolerant!

Granted! Now you're water intolerant!!


I wish I didn't have to poop

Granted, but now you always feel like you have to pee.

I wish I could shapeshift!

Granted, but you lose your sense of identity.

I wish I had some classic ranch rn. :L

Granted, but its only like half of a dipping cups worth.

I wish I didn't have so much anxiety about work and my boss.

Granted, but now you have a lot of anxiety about everything else.

I wish I had normal-sized feet

granted, but they stanky af

I wish I could disable some animations in Animal Crossing Pocket Camp. >-|o

Granted, but now the rest of the animations take longer

I wish I knew what to wish for

Granted, but you won't know how to achieve your wish.

I wish I could bake a perfect souffle

Granted but it has no taste every time.

I wish I could sleep easier =D

Granted, but now it's next to impossible to wake up.
I wish my bills were paid off!

Granted but now you have no money!

I wish I can get super drunk tonight and wakeup with little to no hangover.

Granted, but you wake up with a random stranger in your bed. o_O

I wish my bronchitis would go away asap.

Granted! Now you have tuberculosis.


I wish the weather was this cool always.

Granted, but now the whole ecosystem is thrown out of whack

I wish I was shorter!